Side Story – Farewell [1]
[78]
Bella’s funeral was held.
Until her last breath, Bella officially held no position of any kind.
Worried that her humble origins and past might burden Ray and Lea, she refused to accept even a symbolic title during her lifetime.
Officially, she was neither the mother of the Emperor nor even Jimy’s consort.
Publicly, Bella was nothing more than a woman of low birth with no connection to the nobility.
However, Bella’s funeral was far from meager.
It took place in the vicinity of the Imperial Capital, on Jimy’s personal lands, where many influential figures from across the continent attended to pay their respects.
Officials and military units dispatched by imperial decree assisted in the funeral proceedings.
For a woman who had no official public achievements during her life, it was an unprecedented level of honor.
Nevertheless, there were none left to openly grumble about it now.
Even those with a modicum of sense refrained from voicing complaints behind closed doors.
The powerful of the continent well knew the price they would have to pay if even a single slip of the tongue were to leak out.
Of course, while there were no outward displays of dissatisfaction, procedural confusion still needed to be avoided. It was impossible to keep Bella as simply a woman without any title until the very end.
Thus, after her death, Jimy publicly announced that Bella had been his lifelong partner.
Bella’s final title, inscribed on her tombstone, was Duchess of the Helm Dukedom.
During the funeral, Ray quietly kept vigil beside Bella, who had passed into eternal rest.
As days turned into weeks and the funeral rites gradually concluded, Ray still struggled to grasp the reality of it all.
Throughout the entire ceremony, Ray did not close his eyes once, silently shedding tears in a deep sorrow he could not escape.
In contrast, Lea, while deeply saddened by Bella’s passing, maintained composure and prayed for her eternal peace.
Lea had long anticipated such a moment in the not-so-distant future and had prepared herself mentally, allowing her to face the grief of parting with a calm acceptance.
As time flowed and countless mourners paid their respects, Bella’s funeral finally came to an end.
Bella was laid to rest in the Helm Dukedom’s territory.
Jimy created a small garden around her tomb, where flowers that Bella loved bloomed, softly illuminating her resting place.
A few more days passed after the conclusion of the funeral and all its procedures.
Yet Ray remained in the fragrant garden, unable to tear himself away from Bella’s gravestone, staring at it endlessly.
Watching Ray’s silhouette from behind, Jimy approached him.
“…”
Jimy stood beside Ray, gazing at Bella’s gravestone.
Memories of times shared with Bella surfaced, filling Jimy with a somber ache.
Gently stroking his cheek, Jimy began to speak slowly.
“…Lately, I’ve been trying to cultivate some culture by imitating the nobles.”
“…”
“In a book I read the other day, there was this line: Life shines because of its hardships and trials.”
“…”
Ray continued to remain silent.
Though conversation seemed difficult, knowing that Ray was listening, Jimy continued steadily.
“…Her life wasn’t always happy, was it?”
This was a reflection on Bella’s life.
Her journey had not been smooth since childhood, and it was undoubtedly far from ideal happiness.
However, just because her life wasn’t always joyful does not mean it was entirely unhappy.
“…Bella lived a life of devotion. She was betrayed by those she devoted herself to and suffered because of it. But… in the end, she received the recognition she deserved.”
“…”
“The smartest and most talented son in the world brought happiness to Bella’s life…”
“…”
“Bella was respected, loved, and able to achieve the dream she had cherished all her life.”
“…”
“When that precious son fell into a long slumber… Bella was afraid. She feared losing you. She spent many nights crying and blaming herself. But then a miracle happened.”
“…”
“The day you returned, Bella was saved.”
Only after Ray’s return could Bella finally embrace peace and smile serenely.
Recalling that serene smile Bella regained, Jimy too wore a faint smile.
“Ray, Bella lived a radiant life. She achieved the dream she had pursued her whole life and, before her time came to an end, she was redeemed… She passed away with a peaceful, happy smile, leaving no regrets.”
“…”
Hearing Jimy’s comforting words, Ray wiped his face.
After a long silence, lips tightly clenched, Ray finally asked Jimy in a voice strained with suppressed sorrow:
“Jimy… I… don’t know. Did I… do something wrong?”
“…”
“My mom… she said… she said she was a burden to me… She blamed herself for being nothing but a heavy weight… Did I push her too hard? Was she suffering because of me?”
Ray sobbed.
It shouldn’t have been like this.
It absolutely should not have been like this.
Because of Bella’s devotion, Ray decided to live his life.
When Ray stumbled and despaired, Bella was the one who saved him.
To Ray, Bella was not a burden but the reason to live, the sunlight that made his heart beat.
Surely, it had been like that…
Had Bella perceived Ray’s love and devotion as a source of pain?
“Khh… Huff…”
Unable to stop the tears streaming down, Ray trembled.
At that moment, Jimy firmly grabbed Ray’s shoulder and shook his head.
“Ray, that’s not it.”
“…”
“Bella loved you as a mother.
Not out of pity or obligation…
Bella truly saw you as her son and loved you.
Just as much as you loved her…
You were someone irreplaceable to her, a treasure beyond compare.”
“…”
“To become a parent… to wish for your child’s future and happiness above your own life… and as you live selflessly for them, you find joy and fulfillment in your sacrifices. That’s what being a parent is.”
Your peace over mine.
Your joy over mine.
Your future over mine.
Is the life of a parent who sacrifices for their child an unhappy one?
Absolutely not.
That was the happiness of a parent.
“Ray… Bella lived a dream-like, blissful life. You fulfilled her dreams. And Bella’s final wish… was for the happiness of her beloved son.”
Bella wanted Ray to live his own life.
She hoped that Ray would leave her arms and truly pursue the life he desired.
“Do you think Bella’s devotion to her beloved son caused her pain?”
“…”
“No, Ray. That devotion is the ultimate happiness for a parent.”
“…”
“So… don’t blame yourself. You’re her son, her only precious son. All you need to do is be grateful for her devotion. That’s what Bella wished for.”
“…”
Blood dripped from Ray’s lips.
When Ray first reincarnated into this world, overcome with despair, Bella was the one who saved him.
Thanks to Bella’s devotion, Ray overcame his despair and continued living.
Later, as Ray journeyed through this world, he formed new precious connections.
Over time, these new bonds began guiding Ray’s life.
As new relationships formed, Bella’s presence gradually became less distinct.
This is how children naturally grow independent from their parents.
But Ray didn’t do that.
For Ray, Bella was always the center of his life.
And it would never change.
So Bella chose to step away from her son’s side for his sake.
Having already achieved everything she set out to do, Bella rejoiced in the knowledge that there was still more she could do for her beloved son.
Because of this, Bella passed with a truly happy smile on her face.
“…”
Ray clutched his chest.
It hurts.
It hurts so much that tears continue to stream down his cheeks.
But…
The pain of parting belongs to those left behind, not those who have departed.
Looking up to the sky, Ray let his tears flow.
“…”
An overwhelming sorrow tore through his chest.
Simultaneously, however, Ray felt the oppressive sense of duty that had weighed on him since his reincarnation gradually dissipate.
As Bella wished, Ray was finally ready to stand on his own.
“…”
Despite the tears, Ray tried to force a smile.
He already missed Bella’s warmth.
He wanted to hear his mother call him “my son” again.
But this was the inevitable pain of farewell everyone must endure.
Not all farewells are tragedies.
Farewell marks an ending, and Bella’s life ended happily.
Now Ray had to walk a new path, independent of Bella.
“Mom… I’ll try… I’ll work hard. As you wished… I’ll live my life… and give it my best shot.”
Ray whispered these words, kneeling before Bella’s gravestone.
Jimy gently patted Ray’s shoulder in quiet support.
Honoring Bella’s life, which endured hardship but ultimately reached a happy ending.
Jimy, too, shed tears as he remained there for a while longer.
*
Bella had always been the center of Ray’s life.
Even though Bella was gone, Ray was not broken, thanks to the precious connections that remained by his side.
After a brief period of wandering, Ray found the strength to steady his resolve.
Standing back up, Ray could now contemplate living not for Bella but for himself.
“…”
Ray was still Ray.
Thinking of “his life” did not mean dreaming of different ideologies or values.
Simply, Ray could now envision the future he dreamed of with a little more freedom, freed from a lifetime of obligation.
After much contemplation…
Ray sought out Johanna.
“Johanna, I have a favor to ask.”
“What kind of favor?”
“Will you… travel with me?”
Even though the war had ended, the world was still full of chaos.
It was a result of Ray’s choices.
Right or wrong, and regardless of Luna’s legacy, Ray had no intention of turning away from this tragedy.
Ray planned to personally inspect the disarrayed continent.
Through this, he intended to find ways to restore stability and help heal those who had been hurt.
It was both an act of penance and Ray’s challenge to love this world, which he once viewed only as an adversary.
Of course, in his current state, he couldn’t wander the continent alone.
So he asked Johanna for help.
“…”
This was Ray’s first decision made independently after Bella’s passing.
His eyes were still bloodshot from crying, but the determination in Ray’s gaze was unwavering.
Johanna smiled brightly upon facing Ray.
“Alright.”
“Thank you.”
Thus, Ray took his first step out of Bella’s shadow.
