The heat was not too severe.
It wasn’t a place that experienced intense heat to begin with, due to its higher altitude compared to other locations.
However, today, the heat was particularly less oppressive. It wasn’t exactly a welcome change for me. I was more resilient to heat than cold, and today, I found myself wanting to lose consciousness in the sweltering warmth.
[Ah—. This is an announcement. Our train is now approaching the Holy Empire’s Saint Domenico platform. Please make sure you check for any belongings you may have left behind before disembarking….]
The announcement echoed throughout the train. Wounded soldiers and weary priests, scattered across the train’s compartments and even the hallway, lifted their heads in response. I was one of them.
[…therefore, if you have left any belongings behind, please notify the station staff at the platform immediately.]
With the announcement concluding, the dazed soldiers and priests who had been staring vacantly at the ceiling dropped their dim, lifeless eyes to the ground once more.
I was one of them.
The train attendants bustled down the aisle. The few priests and I, who had given our seats to the wounded soldiers struggling to stand, had to curl up our bodies to avoid obstructing the attendants, unable to stretch our legs comfortably.
The Holy Empire did not provide many trains for us. They were the ones who called us and prioritized sending us to the Holy Empire, yet the train conditions were far from satisfactory. Did they lack financial resources?
But it was the Empire that had been directly entangled in this war and contributed most significantly to its victories. It was also the Empire that had suffered the greatest sacrifices.
What harm had the Holy Empire faced?
“Cough! Ugh…!”
The priest sitting across from me clamped his mouth shut and hurriedly got up to rush to the restroom. I silently watched him disappear behind the door leading to the next carriage.
“Haha… It’s quite smelly in here.”
I turned my head to the one who spoke to me. The haggard-looking female priest sitting next to me forced a smile. Her bandaged head didn’t look pleasant at all. I noticed a tiny, bloodstained spot on the white bandage around her right side.
“I used a lot of disinfectant. It fulfills its role.”
As she said, the air inside the train was stifling with the smell of disinfectant. Naturally, it wasn’t enough to be life-threatening; when the train had just departed, the windows were opened wide to ventilate the cabin. But now, it had become difficult. Most of the windows were locked, except for the compartments deemed safe by the attendants and a few selected ones.
This was because, on the way here, a soldier who had lost both arms and his eyesight had thrown himself out the open window.
Since that day, we had to endure this awful disinfectant smell. When attempting to sleep, we had to press ourselves against the ventilation ports and windows tightly. Otherwise, our noses would become twisted.
Due to a single impulsive decision, many had to feel discomfort. Yet those aboard the train did not resent that man, who had chosen death over the courage to live after despairing of his own life. No one, really, not a single person.
Neither did I. Having the courage to not fear death remained a challenging thing for me.
…But you are different, Helena.
“It seems there were quite a few more people dropped off at the Empire station five days ago.”
Regardless of whether I replied or not, the unnamed female priest beside me continued to talk.
“It seems many who were injured got worse…. They probably moved to a bigger hospital, right?”
“…….”
“Still, it’s a relief. We couldn’t do anything for them. Once they left our hands, maybe….”
“…They probably didn’t go to a hospital.”
My cracked lips parted. Even in summer, they were so dry that they felt like they might crack and split; it was because I hadn’t been eating or drinking well.
The female priest flinched upon hearing my words. She searched for something to say, her eyes darting around before she eventually lowered her gaze, trembling as her stiff mouth quivered.
“How do you know… that?”
“I happened to see it while smoking. The attendants were carrying a few corpses down a side path next to the platform.”
“……”
“They were people with severe injuries.”
They just couldn’t endure it. Really, just that.
“Haha. That makes sense. Yes….”
“……”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought that up.”
I chose not to respond. She had indeed spoken unwisely.
The floor of the aisle felt damp. A bitter taste lingered in my mouth. I had to carry this bitter and astringent feeling fully on my own.
And it was that much worse because of the female priest sitting next to me.
“…Shall we introduce ourselves?”
“……”
“My name is Camillia. Acolyte Camillia.”
“…Antorelli.”
“Hmm… You’re Reverend Antorelli, then.”
I didn’t mention that although I was an acolyte, I would soon be promoted to a higher rank. It was a fact I didn’t want to blab about unnecessarily.
The fact that they had been keeping an eye on the things I did even in the Holy Empire made me feel a greater sense of betrayal, piercing my heart like a dagger.
Regardless, Acolyte Camillia carried on speaking. She seemed incapable of shutting up.
“I was originally born in the Holy Empire, but I moved to the Empire when I was four years old. It was just before my younger sister was born.”
“……”
“It seemed my parents wanted to give us dual citizenship between the Empire and the Holy Empire. They wanted me to attend the Academy….”
The train jolted once. I closed my eyes and surrendered my body to the steady rocking.
“Anyway, apart from returning to the Holy Empire to live the Seminary life in between…. I’ve lived in the Empire ever since. With four younger sisters and my parents.”
Thud thud. From the speaker where the announcement had just echoed, the sound of someone adjusting the microphone could be heard. It seemed they were about to make another announcement.
“It wasn’t a particularly affluent life. I had four younger sisters. But, my immediate younger sister got into a pretty prestigious academy.”
– It’s true…. She worked at an academy so famous that everyone would know the name, right?
– Hmm… Where is that?
“…Caldera Imperial Academy.”
“Oh wow, that’s right. How did you know?”
Acolyte Camillia tilted her head, putting on a show of surprise, as if to say, ‘Have we met before?’
“Anyway, yes. My sister got into a place like that.”
“Congratulations.”
“Haha… Although she has dropped out now.”
“……”
The congratulations I had just offered immediately felt meaningless. I opted to keep silent instead.
“My father was one of the first to participate in the war.”
“……”
“And… he perished. Early in the war….”
Acolyte Camillia’s eyes darkened slightly. Her black hair fell gently over her face.
“And then, my sister… dropped out.”
My head felt slightly dizzy. It felt like I was missing something.
“…I’m sorry. I’ve been rambling too much about personal matters. Like a fool….”
Yet, I couldn’t figure that out. My mind was solely filled with memories of Helena.
[Ah—. This is an announcement. Shortly, our train will arrive at the Saint Domenico platform. When disembarking, please maintain order….]
“Ah, it seems the train is about to stop.”
“……”
As Acolyte Camillia said, the train’s movement gradually slowed. The scenery outside, which had been rushing by like the wind, stopped and slowly revealed its outlines.
Alongside that, the train’s previously jolting movements began to settle down. The sound of metal scraping could be heard increasingly.
[…therefore, please be careful not to leave any belongings behind.]
Soon, with a thud, the microphone would turn off. The conductor would, as always, let us off at the platform and head back to pick up more passengers.
[…the conductor’s announcement ends here.]
My judgment had turned out to be completely incorrect.
[I was born in the Empire. The second son of a farmer.]
As the conductor’s personal story, which no one had cared about, began spilling out, several priests and wounded soldiers started to lift their heads one by one. Their expressions resembled baby birds seeking food.
[Since I was young, it had been my dream to become a train conductor. This massive iron behemoth looked so impressive back then….]
Hahaha—. The conductor let out a hearty laugh as he continued his story.
[Of course, now it’s just a job. I no longer feel excited at the sight of trains like I used to, and my interest has faded. Anything can get boring when it becomes work, I suppose. That’s how it is for me.]
Just carrying passengers, sending them off, carrying them, and sending them off….
[But just a week ago, while driving the train as usual, my heart began to race for the first time in a long while. After all, I was responsible for the return of the heroes who defended the Empire, wasn’t I?]
The announcement paused momentarily. The conductor took a brief breath, as if letting out a sigh.
[Everyone. Thank you, and thank you again.]
I raised my head. Like me, those who had been staring down at the ground until now began to lift their heads and look at the speaker.
[Thanks to all of you, we can once again live our daily lives. You are heroes.]
Was his remark somehow empowering?
Gradually, light began to flicker in people’s eyes.
[…the train is about to enter the platform. We would appreciate it if you could prepare to disembark.]
With the clichéd remark as a conclusion, the announcement ended. The people who had been sitting in a daze did not rise until the train came to a complete stop.
Once the train had fully halted, a few priests, including myself, slowly began to rise, causing the remaining people to scramble up as well.
– Chiiing—!
The train doors opened.
[Goodbye.]
Perhaps, it should never have opened.
In the Empire, 1919, summer.
That summer was a bit more chilly than the usual summer.
“I’m out!!”
“You filthy murderers—!”
– Crash!
What the conductor mentioned turned out to be overwhelmingly despairing.
