Airen Rufemyon disliked Ian Fercurus.
It was an emotion that she couldn’t quite identify as being fear or reluctance.
In any case, she disliked Ian Fercurus.
If asked to list reasons for her disdain, she could readily provide several.
First, he had publicly splashed water on her lord, whom Airen served, thereby humiliating him.
It was an intolerable injustice for a loyal knight. After all, her lord Shi-en was merely having a conversation.
Problems that arose from words typically require resolution through words.
Even if the situation didn’t directly involve the nobility of the Empire and the princess, splashing water during a conversation was a grave rudeness.
And second, he was brazen enough to act with such impunity after his blunder.
He behaved as if what he had done was a matter of course. He even had the audacity to restrain Airen, who had drawn her sword in retaliation.
Moreover, as a third-year student at the academy, what was that?
It was her first experience of humiliation to be told that if she didn’t want to regret it, she should take her hands off the sword.
Airen had ample justification to punish him.
Lastly, thirdly, she had been utterly defeated by him, who had acted so boldly.
It was merely a single exchange.
But it was enough for her to keenly feel the difference in capabilities.
When her sword path was derailed and her world flipped upside down in an instant, Airen realized.
She couldn’t win.
Though she couldn’t even collect her thoughts properly, lying on the ground with her breath faltering, she thought that.
It was the moment she finally grasped the source of the peculiar anxiety she had felt just before facing the man.
Her opponent was more akin to a monster than a human.
Those eyes that felt no hint of emotion, the skill to read the flow of magical power, and the audacity to strike down the princess’s royal guard without a moment’s hesitation.
Even so, until the very end, Airen retained her fighting spirit.
She knew it was impossible to overpower him. But her lord had been insulted, and she had fallen in a single blow.
If she couldn’t even land a single hit, she couldn’t hold her head up.
It was then that the axe was buried in Airen’s shoulder.
With a thud, the blade dug between her bones, and its power was terrifying in relation to its speed. A scream escaped her lips involuntarily.
What followed was a nightmare.
Blood splattered, bones were fractured, and marrow was exposed between the cracks.
She had long since gone numb to the sensation of pain. Only with her hazy mind did she clearly feel the death approaching.
However, more intensely than the physical pain, it was Ian’s casual evaluations that pierced Airen’s heart.
“The standard of the royal guards is pitiful. A mental reevaluation is necessary.”
“How can those who protect falter even with their lord behind them?”
“It was the debt your lord had to bear.”
Each indifferent word the man uttered pierced her heart like a blade.
For Airen Rufemyon, who prided herself as a knight, these assessments were akin to a death sentence.
The reason her lord wasn’t injured was solely due to the man’s mercy.
Considering he merely punished the royal guards, including Airen, she was meant to be grateful to him.
Yet it felt like an unbearable humiliation.
She was unfit as a guard and unfit as a knight.
Anyone could expect some measure of mercy from their opponent.
It would have been better to bow and flatter just to plead for mercy. The more she repeated such thoughts, the more she was enveloped in self-loathing.
She was a failure.
Unfit both as a guard and as a knight.
Naturally, Airen would have to spend some time in the infirmary.
As the days dragged on, trapped in bed without being able to do anything, her depression deepened further.
Even with Shi-en coming to visit her often to chat, she still felt this way.
In fact, Shi-en’s kindness only frightened her more.
She felt like she wouldn’t be able to remain as a worthy guard knight.
Airen finally managed to leave the temple only after several days had passed.
In terms of injuries, she was in better shape than others. The royal guard, Zerros, who had his arm severed by Ian, had to return to his hometown for an extended period due to being deemed unable to fight.
Nonetheless, the reality awaiting Airen upon her discharge was daunting.
Every step she took was met with whispers.
“Is that the knight?”
“I heard she lost to Senior Ian from the Swordsmanship Department.”
“They say he’s our senior, how embarrassing.”
The mockery and jeers directed at Airen weren’t limited to the academy students.
She received blatant letters of disappointment from the Royal Guard division, as well as correspondence from families concerned about their prestige and honor.
Airen had never disappointed anyone before.
In truth, no matter how she considered it, what happened wasn’t entirely her fault. It would be more reasonable to think that if all four of the royal guards were defeated at once, their opponent must have been unexpectedly powerful.
However, people do not think solely in one direction.
If they deemed Ian Fercurus unexpectedly strong, they simultaneously judged that the royal guards, including Airen, were unexpectedly weak.
That was the only means to reconcile reality with their common sense.
As the proud daughter of the Rufemyon family and a close aide to the Fifth Imperial Princess, Airen had thus become a recluse.
However, Shi-en uniquely would not give up on her.
Every morning, she would knock on the door and personally come to persuade her.
Though there was sincerity, Airen also felt a somewhat selfish calculation in Shi-en wanting to remain close to the princess. She couldn’t help but be moved by that sincerity.
Yet, Airen was terrified of stepping out of her room.
The outside world existed there.
A world where she had to face ridicule and scorn at every step, and where letters discreetly packaged with disappointment continued to arrive.
There was no way she would want to go out. Yet once again, the one who dragged her outside was her lord, Shi-en.
Shi-en seemed to want Airen to shed the fear she carried.
Though whispers still reached her ears, the princess walked with her head held high. It was as if she displayed no shame for Airen.
Receiving deep comfort from that, Airen thought.
This time, I will not disappoint Her Highness the Princess.
Just a few hours after making that firm resolution.
Airen’s complexion turned pale. It was right after she witnessed the man’s axe work.
The fluidity of his movements revealed no hint of hesitation whatsoever.
It was just like back then. That man was still a monster.
As anxiety gripped her, Airen’s hands became drenched in sweat. She swallowed dryly, having to watch the approaching man.
And when the man couldn’t withstand the princess’s provocation and brandished his axe,
Airen drew her sword as if she had been waiting for this moment.
Now was the chance to wash away all that humiliation.
As a royal guard, she would fight valiantly against her fear and protect her lord.
With that determination, the moment Airen’s sword spread a sharp metallic sound,
“Lady Airen… take your hands off the sword if you don’t want to regret it.”
The indifferent voice she had heard that day stabbed into Airen’s spinal cord. Her body went rigid with a shudder.
But it was merely a fleeting moment of hesitation.
Yet in the battles of masters, sometimes just a split second can be everything.
Before Airen could even extend her blade, the man’s axe was already dripping a cold promise of death.
It was right above the princess’s shoulder.
As the weight of malice was felt, the princess’s body trembled. With disbelief, her gray eyes were fixed on the axe.
The fluttering gaze represented her terror.
The man, unconcerned with her plight, whispered down with a casual expression.
“So, do you believe the outside world will save Her Highness now?”
If he desired, it would have been an easy task for the man to strike the princess’s shoulder.
Of course, it would equally mean he could take her life.
No one here was unaware of that fact.
And so, both Shi-en and Airen could only stand frozen in place.
The man continued to whisper in a lowered voice.
His voice was heavy, yet oddly haunting due to the atmosphere.
“There is no true world inside or outside the academy. The only reality that Your Highness sees and hears right now is the truth.”
Just like this axe, he said, smirking.
The princess’s eyelids fluttered, then soon closed.
It seemed she wanted to say something but couldn’t dare to open her mouth.
Airen watched, her eyes filled with despair.
Again.
She had disappointed.
No matter how little Airen cared about it, the man briefly admired the trembling princess’s state.
And soon he withdrew his axe.
The princess’s bewildered gaze turned to Ian. She seemed ready to hurl her accusations, yet her lips kept going through empty motions, as if the fear hadn’t left her yet.
As if he understood what she meant, Ian answered in a relaxed tone.
“I don’t strike the pitiful with an axe. The people I hit with an axe are only those worthy of it.”
In other words, it meant that the princess wasn’t even worth striking.
For some reason, though, it was because she was pitiful.
It was an unbearable humiliation. Isn’t sympathy an emotion that the strong bestow upon the weak?
It wouldn’t have been strange for the princess to burst out in anger at that moment.
Indeed, her eyes blaze with anger directed swiftly at Ian.
But at that moment she met his golden eyes, Shi-en had no choice but to lower her gaze immediately.
Arguing against Ian’s words would only mean she wanted to be struck by his axe.
The proud Shi-en had just been crushed before the man’s axe.
Airen gritted her teeth with an even more miserable heart.
She felt it was all due to her inadequacy as a royal guard. The moment the man finally cast his gaze upon Airen was then.
“And, royal guard. You… that is…”
Ian trailed off, then tilted his head in thought.
“Who was it again? In any case, it was a pity you hesitated at the end.”
While saying that, the man smirked slightly.
The phrase, “Who was it again,” may have inadvertently pierced deeply into Airen’s heart.
It suggested that she wasn’t worth remembering even by name.
He had called her “Lady Airen” up until last time.
The man, whether he was aware of Airen’s feelings or not, began to walk away again.
And as he brushed past her, his hand tapped Airen’s shoulder several times.
“…If you hadn’t hesitated, you could have blocked it.”
With a sudden snap, something within Airen’s heart broke like a string snapping.
The man left, and Shi-en and Airen, left alone, sank down to the ground without a word.
Shi-en still bore an expression of disbelief, while Airen was panting for breath, overwhelmed with despair.
Airen thought.
I have failed.
The man’s words had been right.
Yes, she was a defective item. She could never win his acknowledgment.
But if she couldn’t be acknowledged by that man, who in the world would acknowledge her?
Before him, she would remain an eternal loser.
The mocking laughter of people echoed in Airen’s ears like a buzzing insect. The admonishing letters sent by the knight order and her family rained down upon her heart, steeped in despair.
The realization maddened her breath, making her want to scream and grasp her own throat.
Ian Fercurus, Ian Fercurus, Ian Fercurus…
As Airen muttered these names in her mind, despair was unveiled in her expression, its depth unfathomable.
She had to win or be acknowledged. If not…
That final hypothesis was one she could not dare to articulate.
It was meaningless.
Otherwise, it would be meaningless.
Her pride as a knight, her life, anything at all.
Airen’s eyes became desperate.
*
It was after that incident that she heard strange rumors in front of the temple.
