Chapter 146

I decided to tell Tia everything.

Without hiding anything. Everything.

Because Tia has the right to know.

And now Tia’s head has grown big enough to understand everything.

‘In fact, it’s all an excuse.’

These are just reasons I attached later.

It’s because I felt uncomfortable.

Because I was frustrated.

Because I didn’t want to be seen as a fake mother by Tia.

‘I really must have gotten sulky.’

– Not even a real mother.

Tia probably didn’t mean it sincerely either.

It was likely just the natural irritation of a teenage girl spilling out.

But what’s certain is that it wasn’t a complete lie.

Tia must have thought, in the back of her mind, that I wasn’t her real mother.

Of course.

Because I taught her that way.

I said I picked Tia up, that she was the daughter of an unknown human woman and an unknown dragon.

I told her that careless lie just to be comfortable for a moment.

There’s nothing to be upset about.

It’s my irresponsibility that caused this.

Because of that irresponsibility, I ended up hurting Tia deeply.

It’s late, but I’m going to root out that misunderstanding now.

I want to become Tia’s real mother even now.

“Tiamat.”

“Mmm…”

“Mom’s not angry. I have something serious to talk about. Can I see your face? I have something to say.”

“….”

Tia looks up at me, sniffling after stopping her tears.

As I wipe her eyes with my fingers, her face stretches out like soft rice cake.

She’s really cute.

But thinking about how this face will be colored with confusion and horror from now on makes me hesitate a little.

I have to speak.

I barely move my twitching vocal cords, as if paralyzed, and say again.

“The truth is, Mom hasn’t told Tia something. No, I’ve lied.”

“What is it…?”

“Mom is actually Tia’s real mom.”

“M-Mom! I don’t think of you as a fake mom! Tia said that wrong earlier! I’m sorry!”

“No, that’s not what I mean. Huh… Haah… Mom is actually…”

My lips tremble.

At the very last moment, my courage falters, and I rest my chin on Tia’s head, starting to whisper.

“I’m your biological mother.”

“….”

So, I cleared up the long-held lies.

I revealed everything to Tia.

The fact that Tia was conceived unintentionally.

All of how her father is a trashy dragon.

Of course, I didn’t mention how hard it was for me to accept that she was conceived and how I hated her for a long time after giving birth.

Those were unnecessary words.

If Tia is as clever as I think, she could infer enough from what I just told her.

I didn’t want to hammer that into Tia’s heart.

After knowing everything, Tia, instead of being shocked by the fact that she was an unwanted child…

“Then where is Tia’s father… No, the dragon?”

“I don’t know. I can’t find out. I happened to meet him once again, but he ran away the moment he accepted my help.”

“How can there be such a bad person! Why is he doing this to Mom!”

“Ahaha. I know right…”

She started to get all worked up.

Just for a moment, she looked dazed.

It seems she quickly understood the situation because she’s smart.

“Mom, I’m really sorry for lying until now…”

“No, it’s okay. In any case, it doesn’t change anything. All that can happen is that Mom becomes Tia’s real mother. It can only get better, right?”

“Ugh…”

I felt like I might burst into tears from how proud I was.

How can she choose such beautiful words?

I’ve done so many foolish things…

‘I guess I really shouldn’t be giving advice to Irina.’

I remembered the advice I once gave to Irina.

Whether it’s about living or anything else, to quickly go find the children they gave up for adoption.

Before they forget their faces.

Before it becomes an irreversible situation.

And yet I kept putting off telling Tia the truth.

But I’m really glad I gathered the courage now.

Irina is becoming the mother of the two children again.

And I have truly become Tia’s real mother.

I’m really glad we’re not late…

“Mom. When Tia finds Daddy later, should I scold him?”

“Huh, what? Scold him?”

“I’m angry! Tia will catch Daddy later and bring him to Mom. Mom can decide what to do with him.”

“Umm… No…”

We were talking about something a bit creepy.

Catching a dragon and bringing it in front of me.

It reminded me of the ancient legends of this world.

But I shook my head and calmed Tia down.

“I don’t want to see him ever again. I don’t even want to waste my energy to be angry at that dragon. I just want him to disappear completely until he dies.”

Revenge is meaningless.

I’ve always thought it’s something weaklings say, but even with the weapon of being able to catch a dragon and make it kneel, I still don’t feel like I want revenge.

Am I avoiding it out of fear?

No, it’s because it’s dirty.

Now I just want him to completely disappear from my life.

I don’t need any apologies or compensation; I just want him to vanish completely.

It seems like I could almost forgive the duke now, but that black dragon is out of the question.

“Are you sleepy? Do you want to sleep early?”

“Mmm…”

“Good night. And thank you, my daughter. For listening without being shocked.”

“Mmmhh. Mommy. I’m so happy…”

After crying and laughing several times, it seemed Tia was quickly getting tired, as her eyes began to slowly close.

Lying on the bed holding me, Tia’s warmth felt nice.

Just like any other time, just as usual.

I was so grateful, and at the same time, sorry for Tia, who accepted such a potentially shocking story without surprise and got angry on my behalf, that I continued to stroke her head until she fell asleep.

“Mmm… Huh…”

After covering Tia, who had fallen asleep as if fainting, with a blanket, I stepped outside.

It wasn’t late yet.

There was probably a lot of cleaning piled up.

Just as I thought I should hurry to help…

“Oh.”

“Ahem…”

As soon as I stepped into the hallway, I froze when I came face to face with a man leaning against the wall.

The duke glanced at me and awkwardly cleared his throat.

Now that I think about it, the door had been open throughout my conversation with Tia.

I hadn’t even thought to close it.

“How much did you hear?”

“Well, I think I heard enough.”

“I see…”

A hollow laugh escaped me.

I hadn’t intentionally tried to hide it.

Of course, I didn’t want to boast about it either, which is why I didn’t talk about it.

Because of that, I didn’t feel embarrassed about being caught by the duke.

Rather, it felt like justice.

He’s the kind of man who said he was okay with me even when he knew I was a man.

But how about this time?

After finding out that I was a woman who had been raped by a dragon, would he still like me?

“You must have realized how Tia came to be.”

“Yes.”

“Do you think it’s dirty?”

“No! I don’t think so at all!”

“Really? Do you still love me?”

“Of course. Forever. Until the moment I die, I will only hold Julia in my heart. Even if Julia doesn’t accept me.”

“….”

An immediate answer without a hint of hesitation.

My brow furrowed.

This was an unexpected reaction.

I had thought he would at least show some disgust or stammer.

‘He has good stamina. Tch.’

By the way, the duke, today of all days, seemed subdued.

At a time when I would expect him to say something like that he loves me, no matter what kind of past I had, and that we should get married, he was just silently staying by my side.

He seemed to feel like a sinner, hanging his head low, almost as if he had committed a wrongdoing.

“Do you really not think I’m dirty?”

“I don’t. Absolutely not.”

“Of course you wouldn’t. If you said I was dirty, you’d be making yourself dirty again.”

“….”

“I’m joking. I didn’t mean to bring up the past out of the blue to whip you with it.”

“No. You can bring it up and resent me anytime. It’s a big fault after all. But now, I won’t run away again. Even if I reflect and Julia doesn’t accept me, I will always be by your side. Until you tell me to get lost because you can’t stand the sight of me.”

They say love drives people insane.

What is it about me that has made the duke go this crazy?

Why did a person who lived a life of absolute chastity lose his rationality only in front of me?

Why did he choose to dedicate his immortality to my immortality?

I don’t understand.

“Master, this may be a sudden request.”

“Yes. Go ahead.”

I became curious.

Eventually, we would be living forever, frequently facing each other.

Being awkward or uncomfortable would only make our eternal life harder.

So, if by any chance…

If by any chance I was to stay with the duke.

If I was to rely on him, would I be able to find peace?

Would I be able to feel the warmth I felt in the duke’s arms just now?

“Can I hold your hand?”

“Anytime.”

That’s all it was for.

There was no other meaning.

Really.

.

.

.

“….”

Squeak.

Standing by the door where his own story could be heard, the duke bit his lip.

Hearing about his past misdeeds from someone else’s mouth was not an easy task.

The raw resentment flowing from Julia pierced his heart just by the act of listening.

“Oh.”

“Ahem…”

“How much did you hear?”

Soon after Julia came out after putting Tia to bed, she stood by the duke, leaning against the wall.

It seemed she had a story she wanted to share for a long time.

“You must have realized how Tia came to be.”

“Yes.”

“Do you think it’s dirty?”

“No! I don’t think so at all.”

It was a dizzying question.

It was my child; how could I think it’s dirty?

But the fact that I couldn’t tell her the truth was just disastrous.

“Do you really not think I’m dirty?”

“I don’t. Absolutely not.”

Julia persistently stayed by my side, bombarding me with questions as if testing me.

Under the barrage of questions, I felt helpless, as if my heart had been pierced.

Guilt kept flooding in.

Then, at some point.

Julia’s small, white hand gently tapped my hand.

I had resolved to wait and not approach her first.

But it wouldn’t be surprising if it took thousands of years for Julia to fall in love with me.

If I were to push forward, it would be now.

Now that Julia had weakened.

“Can I hold your hand?”

“….Of course.”

The moment I received her consent, my fingers slipped between Julia’s.

Julia trembled slightly, feeling the sensation as she held my hand tightly.

Trying hard not to appear surprised, she slowly turned her head to hide her flushed cheeks.

It didn’t seem like she disliked it.

“Ahh…”

It was maddening.

It was like I was injuring Julia directly while also cradling her injuries.

But the duke wasn’t the kind of man to refuse someone who was finally starting to open her heart.

As he gradually sank into the swamp of guilt, he savored Julia’s fragrant hair.

Desire had overpowered conscience.

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