It was the point in time after the match against ACL.
While I never thought I would lose, it was indeed a burdensome match because of the high expectations.
It would be accurate to say we’ve passed one hurdle.
The game content was a complete victory, so the team’s mood was exceptionally good on the way back.
Even Outro, who usually speaks little, seemed excited.
Hecate, in particular, was very happy.
She had struggled quite a bit against Sparrow in the Spring League, so it’s only natural that today’s match felt triumphant for her after handling things so well.
Humans are greatly influenced by their surroundings, and I was no exception.
I needed someone to share this feeling with, so I turned on my broadcast as soon as I got back to the dormitory.
[Title: A Brief Broadcast Before Bed]
[‘Sigma Gawol’ is live.]
[ON AIR | 00:00:05 | WEBCAM]
Oops.
I should have prepared the camera setting earlier. It’s been too long since I last did a key-cam broadcast, so I didn’t think about it.
“Hello. Can you see me clearly?”
I secured the camera so it wouldn’t shake and checked the screen on the monitor. Aside from being a bit too close-up at one point, there were no major issues.
– Huh
– What the hell, nipples already
– Kya, this is it
Seems like the camera was too close to my chest. I’ll be more careful next time.
Nevertheless, despite it being an unplanned broadcast, a lot of people came by. Seeing the chat window quickly fill with activity made me feel good. It was like my body was warming up.
I should have picked up some drinks. There’s probably some beer in the fridge downstairs.
It would have been better to also grab some snacks.
“I haven’t been streaming much recently, so I thought I’d turn it on. It’s been a while.”
– So where are we?
– Tenryou, this is why Solrang got crazy again
– Stop using the chain scythe
– This looks like Sigma’s dormitory from the video I’ve seen
– Show us the room
“Yes, it’s the dormitory. My room. Would you like a quick tour? It’s not very fancy though.”
There’s not much interesting in this room, but if the viewers are curious, there’s no harm in showing it.
It’s a pretty standard room provided by Sigma, pretty much unchanged. The furniture is all the same, and there’s been no real change to the bedding or cushions.
All my stuff could fit into one carry-on. The only noticeable things… Maybe the pajamas hanging in the closet, or the yoga mat rolled up in the corner? I should have tucked the pajamas away.
I didn’t even realize they were hanging there, having worn them for so long that it just felt normal.
“I use the yoga mat when I do some simple exercise in the room. Since I have issues with my legs, I mostly do seated or lying down exercises. It’s convenient to have one.”
It was something given to me by my master, suggesting that I should at least stretch since I couldn’t attend the dojo.
Other than that, there’s nothing else of note that I’ve added.
“The room feels a bit empty, doesn’t it? Sorry if you were expecting more. I simply don’t have the hobby of collecting things.”
That’s been the case since I was young. I’ve never had much material desire.
It’s not as if I ever thought I needed to save money, but I rarely wanted anything.
As long as I have what I need for the moment, it’s enough. Most of my purchases have been items related to kendo anyway, and I’ve been using the tablet my parents bought me for a long time.
Even if I had the habit of spending money, I probably wouldn’t have been able to do so for a while because it wasn’t long ago that I started having a bit of extra money in my account.
Until just a few months ago, I was in a position where I was worried about every little bit of money.
As I watched the chat window, I noticed voices started converging on one topic.
“Do you want me to show you the pajamas? They’re only worn indoors, so it’s a bit embarrassing… Hmm, okay. Probably showing my pajamas wouldn’t hurt. Let me turn the camera around for a bit.”
– Oh, there’s a shadow
– What the fuck, What the fuck, What the fuck, What the fuck, What the fuck, What the fuck
– (Chat removed)
– Hey judge, she started it!
I turned the camera towards the wall and changed my clothes. I hadn’t realized this outfit was a bit revealing around the chest because I’ve worn it so often.
This should be fine. It’s not overly revealing, and there’s no way to hide it anyway. If I focused too much on it, it would only draw more attention.
Thinking about it, this is the first time I’m showing my casual side like this. Usually, when I stream, I put in some effort.
When I was with Elderlyn, especially, I was pretty much forcibly made up.
Compared to that, I’m pretty relaxed now. Being too lax can be bad, though. What a dilemma.
I shifted the camera back after sitting on the edge of the bed.
“I usually spend my time like this in the room. Now that I’ve changed clothes, how about we have a little chat? I really wanted to sweep through everyone today…”
As I was talking, my hands felt a bit idle.
I fetched a pillow and hugged it, then continued talking softly.
It’s enjoyable that there are people listening to me. I calmly talk, answer any questions, and I’ve even heard that my streams are pretty engaging, responding well to questions and providing useful content.
That’s something I take pride in. Of course, it’d be nice if people didn’t say it was “unexpected.”
By the time the stream had gone on for over an hour, a donation from one of the viewers caught my attention.
「SoYeonIsGentleman donates 10,000 won」
「Are you feeling alright? Your complexion looks pretty bad.」
Glancing at the mirror, it was true.
Although my skin is usually pale, today, it seemed to lack vitality. I must have accumulated more fatigue than I thought.
“Oh…? Now that you mention it, that’s definitely true. I’m just tired, I guess. Let’s end the stream here, shall we?”
It’s weird. At the venue, my condition didn’t seem this bad.
For some reason, this dip in condition feels familiar.
Now that I think about it, how many days has it been?
Suddenly, I got Goosebumps down my spine.
*
All women encounter a monthly visitor.
Also known as menstruation or periods. While we don’t bleed into our bedding these days… it’s still not a pleasant experience.
Especially since my menstrual cramps seem quite severe.
I didn’t realize this until recently since I had no one to compare with, but now that there are other women around me, it’s more evident. Hecate and Luche, in particular, live in the same space. Compared to them, my periods are much more painful.
Still, it’s not so bad that I can’t move at all. It’s my period, not some terminal illness after all.
“So, you came even though you’re in pain?”
Today, I had a prior appointment with Elderlyn. It wasn’t anything special, just a plan to grab a meal.
Just because we’re professional gamers doesn’t mean we don’t have holidays. Especially when there’s no important tournament around the corner; pushing without rest will only have the opposite effect. Any such overwork will eventually hit a wall.
In short, it was fortunate that the timing of the discomfort was good. With the usual cycle, it likely won’t interfere with any upcoming training or matches.
“It was a pre-planned meeting, and I don’t have a fever or anything serious.”
“Are you aware that saying that when you actually look really terrible? You’re even breaking out in a cold sweat.”
“…Sorry.”
No, in fact, it was all an excuse.
The pain from the lower abdomen is certainly severe. It feels like my stomach is being gnawed on from the inside, or it’s like a cutter is scratching inside. There’s no denying the feeling of complete exhaustion.
But what hurts more is the mental fluctuation. I suddenly feel like my life is over for no real reason.
When I lived alone, I would usually manage by washing my body in warm water. At Sigma’s dormitory, of course, I can shower, but… I didn’t want to show my vulnerable side to the team yet. I wanted to meet Elderlyn as Da-eun, someone who’s more than just “Gawol.” Hence, I pushed myself.
“We’ll go to the restaurant next time. Let’s rest a bit at my place first.”
“Yes… Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. If someone who’s suffering is also down in spirits, then they can’t be relied on. Cheer up!”
Even though things didn’t go as planned, Elderlyn didn’t get mad. She even invited me over and let me sleep for a while.
Maybe it’s because there’s someone around who provides warmth? After sleeping for an hour or two, my condition definitely improved. After eating some warm abalone porridge, I felt even better.
“Are you still sleepy or anything?”
“No. Actually, I did sleep well tonight.”
“Alright, then how about coming here and lying down for a bit?”
“?…”
Elderlyn patted the spot in front of her on the sofa. When I followed her instructions and laid down, I felt her soft hand start to gently rub my stomach. My toes curled instinctively at the strange sensation.
“Uh, sister?”
“Didn’t you say your cramps are quite bad?”
“Y… yes?”
“Doing this can help ease it. Some abdominal rubbing and uterine massage should help you relax.”
There was a momentary pause in my thoughts.
Uterine… massage?
