– I would like to make an announcement. In a moment, a fireworks display will take place. Visitors are asked to…
The announcement echoes, buzzing in my head as if it’s digging into my brain.
After Laura left, Sophia Sub-priest and I were aimlessly wandering, leaving behind the now cleaned-up haunted house.
Daniel and Chloe from the Occult Research Club suggested that I join them, but I declined. The reason being…
“Phew…!”
Because I didn’t want to show the creeping pain in my shoulder.
I took a deep breath and moved my body. Earlier, Laura had somehow found me, but it was still the right choice to stay hidden in the haunted house to avoid running into Riina. After all, I had never faced her even once.
I glanced at my wristwatch. The hands showed eight o’clock in the evening. The sun had already disappeared, replaced by the darkness of the black night sky.
In the distance, far beyond the sky, a vague boundary of crimson and blue could be seen. The sun had fully set.
‘…The last time I received painkillers from Professor Moritz was around eight-thirty in the morning.’
Professor Moritz had said that the painkillers would last about half a day. He also added that the effect would gradually diminish afterward.
And now, it was almost past that time. My shoulder felt achy, and I reflexively grasped it tightly.
“Head Priest?”
Seeing my condition, Sophia Sub-priest turned to look at me. I immediately removed my hand from my shoulder.
“Are you alright?”
“I’m still fine. More importantly…”
“Should we look for Professor Moritz now?”
I hesitated for a moment, then shook my head. The probability of finding Professor Moritz in this vast academy courtyard would be incredibly low. It would be easier to find a needle in the desert.
Above all, the fireworks would soon begin. I didn’t want to run into Riina, who should be enjoying the fireworks with her family.
“Instead, you have the syringe that Laura gave you, right?”
“Oh, yes. This…”
Sophia Sub-priest rummaged through her belongings and soon held in her hand a small vial of painkillers, a syringe, alcohol swabs, and a small case containing medical gloves. It was what Laura had handed to me.
“Should I inject it now?”
It was a troubling question. Since I didn’t feel any certain pain yet, it seemed that the painkillers were still working.
“…No. It would be better to use it a little later.”
“But, Head Priest…”
“Sophia Sub-priest. If I take more while the medication is still effective, won’t the side effects be quite severe?”
“…That’s true.”
“I’ll wait just a bit longer.”
Saying this, I gently rubbed my aching abdomen.
Looking back, Professor Moritz did say that while the pain relief would be strong, there would be some side effects. Among those was abdominal pain.
‘It’s unbearable.’
To be honest, I could stand still, but moving was difficult. It felt like the sting of not eating anything for two days and suddenly moving vigorously. My face contorted involuntarily.
“Head Priest. Your complexion looks terrible…”
“…It’s because of the side effects. I feel a bit of abdominal pain.”
“A bit?”
“…Not just a bit, to some extent…”
“……”
I couldn’t face Sophia Sub-priest directly. She’s inherently kind and always takes care of others. She is boundlessly generous to others and worries with concern.
I know that she knows about my past and constantly worries about me. After all, anyone would rush to inquire about my condition the moment I slightly grimace.
And because of this, I felt a deep sense of guilt towards Sophia Sub-priest. It felt wrong to make her worry.
“I’m sorry. Sophia Sub-priest.”
“……”
When I apologized as a habit, Sophia Sub-priest glared at me. Come to think of it, I think I promised not to apologize.
“…Head Priest.”
“Sophia Sub-priest.”
Sophia Sub-priest looks at me. Her eyes, which were on my right side, were filled with concern. The gaze was reminiscent of how I might have looked that day.
I slowly waved my hand. At that, her gaze softened a little and then slowly closed as if resigning. As I closed my eyes, her green eyes vanished from my view.
“…I don’t understand.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t understand why you go to such lengths.”
“……”
“I’ve tried to understand up until now, because… you are suffering from a deep wound.”
“That’s…”
“Thinking of someone named Helena and suppressing the guilt so devotedly… I can somewhat understand it. I can’t fully say I understand you because I’ve never been in such a situation.”
– Once again, I would like to make an announcement. In a moment, the fireworks will…
The announcement plays again. Sophia Sub-priest and I fall silent for a moment, only looking at each other’s faces. The sound of the announcement fades away, leaving only Sophia Sub-priest’s voice in my ears.
“But, Head Priest. Even if I try to understand somehow, it doesn’t mean I can just stand and watch you suffer. To me, you are not simply defined as ‘another person.’”
“I know that.”
“If you know, shouldn’t you stop showing such a sight…?”
“……”
I had nothing specific to say.
I looked around. We were standing in the middle of a large tree-lined road that connected the Main Building Courtyard and the Annex Building Courtyard.
There were countless people passing by us. The wide tree-lined road could easily accommodate five people lying down but was crammed with people, making it difficult to find footing.
Even in this situation, Sophia Sub-priest only gazed at me. Her emerald-like clear green eyes were solely fixed on me, not moving at all. There wasn’t even the slightest tremor.
I was different. I noticed the people passing by us, weaving in and out. Their faces were not registering.
I couldn’t focus on Sophia Sub-priest. Rather, to put it another way…
‘…I can’t face her.’
Her eyes.
Sophia Sub-priest’s green eyes. The more I looked, the more it struck me that they were ‘similar.’
I couldn’t bear to look.
If you asked me whether I had shaken it off, that would be a lie. I… still don’t know. I still don’t understand.
– Don’t think of that girl as a substitute for Helena. I clearly said that.
– …That’s correct.
– Then what is this all about now?
Colonel Meijhem’s words echoed in my mind. It was funny.
Because, in the end, I couldn’t send an invitation to the festival to Colonel Meijhem.
‘Pathetic.’
The last time I saw him was when he looked immensely disappointed in me. Disappointment in me, and that look of pity towards poor Sophia Sub-priest who was with me.
I… was terrified of seeing that again.
I was just that kind of man.
– Are you only capable of treating that girl like that? Is that really the case?
– I…
– If that’s really the case, then I’ve misjudged you severely.
Congratulations, Colonel Meijhem. You were right about misjudging me.
You severely misjudged me. When I first met Colonel Meijhem on the front lines, I stood before him as a priest.
A priest craving faith. Even though I was someone who had become a priest, could there be anyone more hypocritical than me?
Because I appeared to have given up on life, yet I craved to live more than anyone else. Didn’t I do just that when the reinforcements arrived after Helena died?
‘Thank goodness,’ I thought—.
And then, seeing Sophia Sub-priest standing before me. If I noticed even a bit of disappointment in her gaze toward me…
‘Thank goodness.’
…What was I even thinking?
“Head Priest.”
A sticky swamp. On the verge of entering a swamp from which I could never escape if I fell in. Sophia Sub-priest’s words pulled me out of that place.
“Even if you think of me as a bothersome woman, I have nothing to say about that. Yes. From your perspective, I might be an annoying and arrogant sub-priest.”
“Not at all.”
“…What?”
My response came out immediately. Sophia Sub-priest seemed a bit surprised.
“I never thought of that, nor do I think so now. You are not an annoying woman at all, Sophia Sub-priest. Rather… you are someone I desperately want to protect, a precious person to me.”
“W-what… if you say that, then I’m relieved…”
“……”
“Um… So, what was I trying to say…? The painkillers, no, that’s not it… Ugh…”
The scenery around us felt like it was rushing by faster, making me dizzy. Is this another side effect of the painkillers?
“W-why are you suddenly saying that!”
“…Huh?”
“If you just say something like that without a care, what becomes of me… Uh…!”
Her voice brimmed with frustration. The soft light of the street lamp seemed blinding.
“…Anyway! Anyway…”
The figures of people passing by us also grew increasingly blurry. It felt like reminiscing about the past. In the center of it all, you were…
“…Thank you.”
No. It was Sophia Sub-priest. Sophia Sub-priest was standing there.
It was only then that I noticed her. Her face, her facial features, her eyes… captivated my vision. The emerald eyes that seemed like they would draw me in completely. I could finally gaze at them fully.
Underneath, her precisely formed lips parted again. They moved, producing a voice distinctly different from Helena’s.
“Thank you, Head Priest…”
“…You’re welcome.”
“Really. And I’m sorry for constantly complaining like this…”
“It’s not a problem, Sophia Sub-priest.”
Finally, I could look at Sophia Sub-priest… just Sophia Sub-priest herself.
It may be just a fleeting moment, but at least for now.
“Sophia Sub-priest.”
“…Yes, Head Priest.”
“Thank you.”
“……”
Sophia Sub-priest’s face turned bright red. She looked like she would burst from the sudden heat, and then she gradually approached me, lowering her head.
– Thud.
She bumped her forehead against my sternum. Her hair stuck to me.
“…That’s unfair, Head Priest.”
“I’m sorry.”
“…Yes. This time, you really have to apologize.”
This time, although Sophia Sub-priest was avoiding my gaze, I could tell.
That her anger had somewhat eased—.
“Ugh…!?”
It hurts.
A sharp, burning pain. I clutched my shoulder and hunched my body. Sophia Sub-priest looked at me with alarmed eyes.
“Head, Head Priest?!”
“Phew…! Phew…! Hah…!”
I knew the painkiller’s effect was nearly wearing off. But I didn’t expect it to come so suddenly…
“Sh-should we go somewhere without people?”
“P-please…”
Speaking was also difficult. I held onto Sophia Sub-priest’s hand, trying to keep my vision somewhat clear by keeping my eyes open wide.
My shoulder hurt to the point where I felt I might faint.
– Crack—.
The warmth from Sophia Sub-priest’s hand felt a bit warmer than before.
‘This is… not so bad….’
It wasn’t a bad outcome at all. Even in the midst of this sharp pain that almost felt dizzying, I found myself thinking that.
But at the same time, these thoughts also arose.
– No matter how hard you try to live a new life, even if you struggle to forget the horrific memories of the battlefield…!
This might be the last time. Perhaps now might be a chance to pay the smallest price.
– Eventually, the postponed hatred will come back someday.
‘…I postponed it.’
To get through this brief moment of time in my lifetime, just to smooth over what was happening right in front of me.
I postponed the time when I could reveal my true feelings to Sophia Sub-priest.
The toll for that will be an even more uncertain future.
