Chapter 23

Thinking about it, I should have committed suicide the moment I realized I was sick.

After all, this rotting body, how much longer could I live? I was too scared to die, and in the end, I drove my brother to his death.

If only I had died sooner, if only I had made the decision a little faster, the person who loved me more than anyone else wouldn’t have had to die.

What am I? What is my life?

When I had strength, I abandoned those who helped me, and by the time I realized who was on my side, I had nothing left in my hands.

Just a cripple. A top-tier cripple. The fool, that was me.

I know it’s an unreasonable request, but if I could just have one more chance.

If I could repay the debt to those who helped me, if I could find a way to repay the kindness of those who aided me.

If I could do that, I would do anything. But no matter how much I regret the past, it won’t come back.

“Your Highness. In the past, you ordered your subordinates to cripple my son and plunder our family’s wealth. Thanks to that, my daughter developed aphasia and still stutters.”

Yes, as someone whose name I can’t even remember told me.

“I wish you would go to hell, but it seems you’re already there.”

No matter how much I regret the past, it can’t be undone.

Living in this hellish present, living a life without a future, I might as well already be dead.

“You must remember, Saint. The reason the Lord helped you today is because He wants you to become someone who helps others.”

Until I met a priest who wiped my back, the dizziness that always clouded my mind was swept away like a storm, replaced by an indescribable sense of euphoria. My ruined body was filled with vitality.

Grace. Boundless grace was there.

I had met many clergy, but I could confidently say that none of the divine power they wielded could even come close to the toes of this great being.

Without realizing it, I spoke with reverence. At that moment, I didn’t even think of myself as a princess.

I was just a lump of flesh. A lump of flesh standing on two legs, and that great being felt like something holy looking down on us from above.

In my understanding, there was only one word to describe such a thing. Only a god.

“Are you… an avatar sent by the gods to this world?”

“Of course not.”

I am just a priest serving the Lord.

Nothing more, nothing less, just an ordinary priest, Kyle.

But I knew it wasn’t that. An ordinary priest couldn’t communicate with the gods like that. Couldn’t convey the Lord’s will like that.

The reason scriptures exist is because not everyone can hear the voice of God.

Even the pope of a sect wouldn’t dare do that. Only saints or holy figures can do so to a limited extent.

“Saint, please tell me about the being you serve.”

So I could kneel without hesitation. The god who gave me another chance. I wanted to express my gratitude to that unknown god.

But no matter how much I, a mere human, prayed, those prayers wouldn’t reach the gods.

However, praying to a saint, who is like the son of God, is the same as praying to God.

“The being I serve is just one who encompasses hope and possibility. He is not a being who grows by faith.”

“I have never heard of such a being.”

No matter how foolish and stupid this Ardein is, I know how impossible the conditions needed to heal me are.

“The being you serve must be an ancient god who surpasses even the Three Divine Gods.”

Both the god and the priest must surpass the ordinary.

Local gods worshipped in a village or so, even if the god himself came, not just a saint chosen by the god, couldn’t heal me.

Even if it’s a priest of a god who surpasses the Three Divine Gods, unless it’s at least a pope or a saint, the result would be the same. A god who surpasses the Three Divine Gods. Yes, I’ve heard of such stories.

“Only an ancient god, the law and axis of this world, could perform such a miracle for me.”

Though called a god, the ancient gods are fundamentally different from the Three Divine Gods, who are personal gods.

Existing since the creation of the world, the very laws of the universe. They are essentially beings that humans cannot worship. Even if you pray, those prayers are just empty echoes, unheard by them.

This world is vast beyond measure, and the laws that govern all things are equally immense. The laws of the universe are so vast and deep that personality within them is like a small, insignificant island in a boundless ocean. Ancient gods generally have no personality, existing merely as laws themselves.

But generally means there are exceptions.

In the long history, I know of tales where ancient gods occasionally awakened with a sense of self and bestowed power upon those who served them.

The universe doesn’t need our faith. Ancient gods are stronger than anything by their very nature.

Those chosen by such beings have performed miracles that astonished the world, leaving their marks on history. It’s probably not well-known.

Many sects, including the Three God Faith, didn’t want such things to be known.

The saint just kept smiling. Somehow, he seemed to think I was wrong. But I couldn’t be wrong.

I saw it with my own eyes, witnessed the miracle.

The tears flowing down my cheeks were proof.

The tears I thought had dried up, falling and flowing on my cheeks, proved that I had truly shaken off the curse of leprosy. The unfamiliar yet pleasant sensation of itching made me feel like I could laugh all day.

“It’s still early, but it would be best for you to stay the night. The Lord has taken away Ms. Leidain’s illness, but not the fatigue accumulated over time.”

“Ah!”

Only then did I realize how dizzy I was. My body felt chilly, and my forehead was slightly warm.

My head felt heavy and dizzy. I could tell my stamina had greatly diminished.

I collapsed onto the bed. It felt like sinking into a warm, comfortable bath. A cozy divine power wrapped around me like a warm blanket.

“Sister. Then rest your eyes for a while.”

It wasn’t a delusion. A soft blanket was draped over me as I fell asleep.

Hoping that all of this wasn’t just a dream, I fell asleep. I didn’t want to sleep, but I was too tired to resist.

Come to think of it, I rode here on horseback with this unhealthy body.

And I hadn’t rested properly. As the tension completely faded, the suppressed fatigue burst out all at once. I was so exhausted that it wouldn’t be strange if I were bedridden for days, but the divine power had alleviated most of the fatigue, so it ended at this.

‘Wait, I…’

In the haze of my fading consciousness, my face flushed.

‘I’m dirty now…’

But only for a moment.

Sleep embraced me warmly and took me to dreamland.

*****

“In the end, I’ll have to wash this blanket again. The bedsheet and the floor too.”

Roka grumbled. You’re not the one doing it, are you?

I just smiled. I’ll do the laundry, not you. I’ll wash it anyway.

I don’t know where Ms. Leidain came from, but her appearance was no different from a beggar. Covered in dust as if she had rolled on the ground, the bed got dirty.

But people are more important than beds. Beds exist for people, not the other way around.

“I should prepare a bath for her. I don’t know where her home is, but I should also prepare the means for her to return.”

“Do you have a reason to go that far?”

“She’s a guest. A guest who came to see me. That’s no different from a guest coming to see the Lord.”

“Still…”

Roka glanced at the sleeping Ms. Leidain and muttered.

“Then I’ll prepare the bath.”

“You? I’d appreciate that.”

“…I don’t like it, but since she’s the master’s guest.”

You’re not going to spit in the bathwater, are you?

Ah, let’s trust Roka. Just as the Lord trusts me, I should trust Roka too.

Roka left for the bathroom, and I sat briefly in a chair, making the sign of the cross and offering a short prayer.

As I was about to get up, I suddenly saw a pure white arm blocking my way. Not just one arm, but hundreds, maybe thousands, filling my vision and covering my sight.

“Did I die in that brief moment?”

Turning around, I saw a familiar face… if you could call it that.

A face devoid of eyes, nose, or mouth, like an empty void, a lightless abyss. This faceless angel and I are old acquaintances.

-Not yet, but it will happen soon.

“I thought Ms. Leidain had poisoned the tea.”

-Leidain is a pseudonym. Her real name is Ardein von Illumina. The princess of the empire you live in.

“That’s a boring joke.”

Now we can joke without hesitation.

Ardein von Illumina. The empire’s war hero. The undefeated Iron Princess.

Even so, by the time Yurinel began to rise, she was already fading from people’s memories.

The empire’s royal family and Yurinel, supported by the Church Country, weren’t on good terms.

Yurinel was like that, and I, a mere priest following her, was no different. I knew Princess Ardein had contracted leprosy, but it was unthinkable for me to seek her out. Above all, a princess, especially the empire’s first princess, could always receive treatment from the Church Country’s saint, so I never thought I could help.

Such a person wouldn’t come here like this.

The Lord worshipped by the Three God Faith must be as great as my Lord.

“Why would the empire’s princess come to me in such a state?”

-Then shall I tell you a more boring joke?

But it seems only I thought it was a joke.

-Apostle. The day you join us is not far off.

The angel spoke to me very seriously.

-In fact, it’s not just your story. A new cycle of this world is about to begin. More dramatic than any previous cycle, and perhaps the last.