Chapter 27

Life is dull. That’s why I always try to live joyfully. My facial muscles have been dead for ages, so it doesn’t really show, but the point is to stay sane in this harsh world. In that sense, I’ve pondered what follows a joyful life.

“It’s love.”

“…Huh? What are you suddenly talking about?”

“Love. To live a joyful and fulfilling life, one must lead a life of love, Young Lady.”

“I think Catherine is already loved enough.”

“If that were the case, wouldn’t I have a partner by now?”

By the way, I will probably remain a lifelong singleton for 40 years. My memories of being male are hazy, but at least I remember that I never had anything to do with women. Both my looks and personality are not exactly entertaining for a lady, so it couldn’t be helped.

In a world with such high standards of appearance, it’s even harder to find a partner. Plus, even though I’m technically a guy, I’m sexually attracted to women. Let me declare this loud and clear: I like women. I like women a lot—like Catherine.

But there’s a huge problem with liking women so much, especially when it comes to Catherine. This world is somewhat tolerant of same-sex love, but same-sex marriage is banned in the Empire. Maybe in the Republic it’s different. But in the Empire… love is… not a thing?

The issue is that I have a female body. Sure, Catherine’s body is soft and pleasantly touchable, but since it’s my body, it’s all topsy-turvy. I want to touch other women’s bodies. I want something soft!

“…Should I immigrate?”

“Catherine?!”

Once I get my Young Lady back and graduate from Apatem Academy safely, maybe I could quit this job. I have enough money as it is. I could set up a shop near the capital of the Republic and manage to earn just enough to get by.

But wait… to date a pretty girl, I probably need a lot of money, right? However, all I’ve learned is household tasks and assassination. Since I can’t exactly be an assassin, it means I have to make a living through household work, but sadly, the Republic doesn’t have maids. No nobles, so it’s to be expected. Maybe there are housekeepers or part-timers, but it’s safe to say that there’s no profession that offers board and meals for household help. Is that really okay, Republic? How am I supposed to survive as a maid like me?

Of course, it wouldn’t matter since they don’t have maids there. Damn.

“Wait, Catherine. Immigration? You’re not thinking of something weird, are you?”

“…Ah, Young Lady. What outfit do you want to wear today?”

“It’s a school uniform, no matter which one?!”

Oh no, I can’t believe I made that mistake. Today, I dressed Lilian, who was matching her cute pink underwear with her school uniform, and even did her make-up lightly. Mmm. My Young Lady looks beautiful again today. Just that makes the world look a little prettier.

In fact, if I had to choose my ideal woman, it would be Lilian right now. The Young Lady can be quite particular about things, after all. But Lilian is a cunning woman who knows how to show kindness. While Yulia showers unconditional kindness and even tries to reform those who wish to harm her, Lilian is the realistic saint in the picture.

Ah, the princess is almost villainous. She’s the kind of person who says the process doesn’t matter if the outcome is beneficial. She has a utilitarian mindset. However, the Empire does need such people. From the Empire’s standpoint, it’s probably better for the princess to become the emperor than the indecisive first prince or the incapable second prince.

“Sigh. Is it over?”

“Yes. There’s still some time left, so it might be good to take a little break.”

“Okay, let’s do that.”

With those words, Lilian sits on the edge of the bed. Her slender legs, wrapped in white stockings, twist as she looks at me intently. Why is she staring like that? Such a strong gaze is a bit uncomfortable.

Just because I think Lilian is my type doesn’t mean I’m pursuing her. I like her, but I am consciously aware that I must return the Young Lady. If I don’t, who will remember our poor Young Lady? She’s been emotionally abused by her parents all her life, always needing to do what she wants to feel better, yet she’d gaze out the window with sad eyes, always awkward and unfortunate.

“So, what’s this talk about love?”

“Young Lady.”

“Yeah?”

Love, as I called out to Lilian with a serious face, she seemed to nod with a hint of tension on her face.

“I have never had a lover until now.”

“…I know that.”

“Spirit, body, and intellect. It means I’m an undeniable virgin.”

I’ve never touched my body for sexual reasons, and while I won’t go into detail, of course, my body is definitely untouched. So, indeed, I’m a perfect virgin. Ding, ding, ding. No objections accepted.

“Uh, okay?”

“I’m now twenty years old. After 15 years in the mansion, I’ve had neither the time nor the thought to find a partner. But where am I right now?”

“Uh? Apatem Academy?”

At Lilian’s answer, I raised a finger, and she tilted her head.

“Yes. It’s a place where vibrant youth frolic around.”

“That’s a bit of a biased image, though… but it’s true, isn’t it?”

“In that sense, I believe I have a reason to pursue relationships. Of course, it wouldn’t affect my service to the Young Lady.”

“Uh… Okay. I get what you’re saying, but I don’t like it.”

“Why not?”

Hearing a refusal is unusual. If it were the Young Lady, she would probably have said yes. Bad Lilian. You must have many suitors. You could marry a handsome, tall, powerful, rich man just by sitting quietly. As my gaze grew cold, Lilian waved her hands in a fluster.

“Ah, no. I didn’t mean that! Just, um… Ah! Shouldn’t Catherine look around a bit?”

“Look around… you say?”

“Yeah. There might be some good partners nearby.”

“Hm.”

Is that so? I recalled the men who approached me when I was in the mansion. Even in this world with high standards, I’d received several confessions from those who were among the handsome ones, but I turned them all down. After all, I like women. If I’d been approached by a woman, I’d have said yes on the spot. Is my appearance not appealing to women?

Well, I guess I could look a bit intimidating if I stayed still. Men get scared when I glare at them, and women must feel even more intimidated. Am I doomed to remain single in this life too? As despair washed over me, Lilian sighed softly.

“Seriously, you have zero awareness.”

“Huh?”

“Ah, never mind. Oh, it’s time. I should be going.”

“Yes.”

What a boring exchange. Once I confirmed with the window that Lilian was joining Yulia, I finally felt relieved and started tidying up the room.

Ah, I want to date.

#

“In that sense, the invasion of the Patraxion Empire resulted in the Republic uniting…”

Listening to the history teacher’s lecture with one ear, Lilian pondered over this morning’s conversation. Love; if possible, she wished it was her by Catherine’s side. Lilian thought of that abruptly and dismissed it. Wouldn’t it be dangerous to get too close to Catherine, who is the antagonist in the original work?

…It might already be too late. Sighing after writing and crossing out Catherine’s name repeatedly in her notebook, Lilian cast her gaze over to Yulia, who was focused on her lesson. Yulia’s golden eyes, symbolizing Divine Power, sparkled beautifully.

Telling her to look around wasn’t without reason. After all, both she and Yulia really liked Catherine. Lilian was an incredibly perceptive woman. She could tell the kind of looks her favorite woman was giving to someone else. She probably looked at Catherine in a similar way herself.

That adorable chest, that slender waist, that bottom one could easily grip with two hands. She wanted to indulge in that soft body and make it her own. Catherine was relatively lax in that regard, so with a little justification, it might be possible to touch her, but doing so could be risky.

It was terrifying to think that it wasn’t Catherine but herself who might not be able to hold back. Although outwardly she was only twenty years old, considering her previous life, she was older than Catherine. The older Lilian had to hold back.

In fact, the main thing was that she didn’t want to be hated by Catherine. No matter how lax Catherine was in that regard, if she went around touching her freely, resentment would be inevitable. Sighing softly, Lilian gazed out the window.

‘Oh, Catherine.’

Just then, Catherine was walking by, a thick book in her hands. What book could she be reading? Since she had talked about love today, it could be a book related to love. As Lilian found herself lost in thought, the princess appeared before Catherine.

‘The princess?’

Now that she thought about it, they seemed quite chummy last time. What was their relationship? Of course, the princess was in a position to keep an eye on the protagonist, Yulia, but she hadn’t been close to Catherine. In fact, the princess tended to harbor a dislike for both Catherine and Lilian.

She caught sight of the princess smiling softly. Then, she took Catherine and vanished. At that moment, various thoughts raced through Lilian’s mind as she stared blankly at the scene.

#