Chapter 329

329 Carrot and Stick #3

Looking back, I was often told as a child that I lacked focus. It was hard for me to concentrate on any one task, and I would quickly dart around restlessly.

My mother, perhaps worried about this, enrolled me in a cram school as if imprisoning me when I was in elementary school.

I recall her repeatedly emphasizing to the principal of the cram school, “My child seems capable of doing anything, but just lacks focus.”

However, every break at the cram school, I would be running around on desks or zooming down the hallways with my inline skates, eventually earning daily scolding from the teachers.

“San, the kids all run around because you’re running. Break time is over, so sit back down.”

“I’m not San! I’m Gaogai-Ger! Hi-ohh-!”

Still, thanks to some latent dexterity which I somehow possessed, I never missed placing in competitions or school exams, to the point where plaques with my name were hung on the cram school bus and neighborhood utility poles every season.

My scatterbrained nature persisted through middle school, though as I entered puberty I became a rather precocious child so my ADHD-like symptoms calmed down.

“Hey, you’re spacing out again. What’s the answer to question 25?”

“Number 5.”

“Where’s 5 in a subjective exam, you moron? I told you not to space out during class!”

However, the inability to concentrate stayed with me, and instead of running around I would often get lost in daydreams.

“Maybe I’m actually a remarkable person.”

“What if by trying hard enough I could use superpowers, or maybe I can see d*ath materialized into threads. Or what if I’m involved in a war over relics because my father is a magician.”

Typical thoughts for a second-year middle school student.

Everyone probably experiences amusing episodes like these, but I truly believed I could do such things. And now looking back, I think I was half-right.

“Was I, perhaps then, beginning to realize that I am different from others, someone extraordinary?”

“Hassan, are you daydreaming again during meditation?”

“No way. I’m meditating properly.”

“Then what’s the answer to the question I assigned?”

“Number 3.”

“Where’s 3 in a subjective exam, you fool!”

Whack-.

“Aaaargh-!”

Something struck my shoulder, making me tear up. No need to ask what it was—it was the whip, used by Elpride for countless years since her time as a slave.

And yet despite my immense strength now, the whip still hurts.

On the other hand, I feel like there’s an excuse to make.

After all, the whip has since ancient times been an extremely powerful weapon.

Even the most accomplished martial artist or seasoned warrior cannot toughen the sensory nerves on the surface of their skin, making it impossible not to cry out like a child under the lash of the whip.

But what if I could use all the often unused muscles of my body to distribute the pain?

Rather than feeling the pain just on the skin, what if I could use my entire body as a cushion to diminish the pain from the whip?

Could I become the first human ever to endure a whipping among all humanity? The pain flows like a stream—can I let the pain flow through me as well?

Just then, I had a sensation akin to cool water running through my mind, as if a brook had flooded my thoughts. To say it bluntly, wouldn’t this be what’s called an awakening?

“This brat, daydreams even while getting whipped! Your head’s finally grown!”

“Shh, pain is just a state. It, too, will pass. That’s the answer I’ve come up with from my meditation.”

Everything passes. The physical pain I feel right now will also eventually fade naturally.

It would be quite accurate to say that I have attained the wisdom of Solomon the Wise, who declared all things as vanity. Did Solomon already understand this wisdom centuries before?

“No, I told you to feel mana. Stop having strange thoughts.”

“Ah.”

At that moment, I realized that the purpose of this meditation was not about pain or suffering but about feeling mana.

After a few hours of bowing my head to Elpride and attending the beginner’s magic school, I had been meditating as instructed, searching for this so-called mana while sitting cross-legged.

But as the moments stretched into hours of quiet contemplation, inevitably, my mind wandered.

Yet just now, I felt like I had attained some kind of deep insight. Was it just me?

Then, I felt something tingling on my right shoulder.

This was evidence of someone attacking me. Although I was vulnerable during meditation, to someone now like me, such transparent attacks are meaningless.

Swoosh-.

I quickly rolled my body to avoid the sudden attack.

“Your whip won’t work on me anymore, Elpride. I’ve surpassed my old self.”

“No, don’t dodge! Taking the whip is part of your training! If you keep dodging, I won’t teach you magic!”

“Hey, Elle. Your yelling can probably be heard outside. The whole inn’s noisy.”

At that moment, someone opened the creaky inn’s door and entered.

Golden short hair, a sharp tri-blade tucked at her waist, utility-laden belts and pockets on her leather clothes. A silver necklace hanging from her neck.

Delphina, the female swordsman who operates as part of the team Rose under Silver Tier adventurer guild.

“Ah, Delphi. Come on in.”

“Why are you so glum at lunchtime?”

“This kid keeps annoying me. He doesn’t even know magic yet and he keeps blabbering nonsense when he begs me to teach him.”

As Elpride complained with a face red with anger, Delphina laughed for a while and then pulled something out of the pouch strapped to her waist.

It was strange. Thin sheets rolled up with some dried leaves. A strange and unfamiliar smell assailed me, making my head feel dizzy.

Ah, it’s tobacco. Delphina is a smoker.

It’s not surprising considering that Antiope smokes too. Hard-living women often indulge in such habits.

“Wanna roll a mana-leaf?”

“No, it’s fine. You know I don’t smoke such things.”

“Ah, not you, Elle. Hassan.”

Delphina offered me what seemed to be a mana-leaf cigarette. Though I politely intended to decline, having no interest in learning to smoke,

“If you want to perceive mana, one of these should make it easier to do so.”

Her additional explanation made my ears prick up. Recognizing my intrigue, Delphina added one more comment in a subtle tone.

“Do you have any idea how incredible it is to feel mana? It’s truly remarkable. The world feels entirely different.”

“Delphi, while mana-leaves do enhance mana-sensing ability, their disadvantages outweigh their benefits, and they’re not recommended for beginners, especially men.”

“Of course, I know. Men become overly sensitive and suffer from premature ej*culation or, conversely, become too dull and struggle with impotence.”

“So, that’s disgusting! Take that horrifying thing away from me now!”

As I was utterly shocked by that dreadful story, Delphina giggled like a hoodlum in a back alley and neatly inserted the mana-leaf cigarette into my ear.

“Work hard, friend. Anyway, I came by to see your face since I heard you’re in Delphi, but I can’t interrupt your meditation. I’ll see you later-.”

With that, Delphina turned around and left the room. By the time her waving hand disappeared down the stairs, I was finally able to open my mouth.

“Looks like you’ve made peace with those guys?”

“Mm-.”

Elfride replied while sitting on the bed.

“No need to call it reconciliation. It’s not uncommon for adventurers to fight and then meet again. Anyway, stop daydreaming and sit back down on the floor. Focus on meditation.”

“….”

Following Elfride’s words, I sat on the floor of the inn room with its hard wooden floor. I closed my eyes just like before and regulated my breathing.

“Empty your thoughts. When you empty your thoughts, your body will become empty, and when your body becomes void, mana will naturally fill it.”

I tried to empty my thoughts as Elfride instructed.

But as I mentioned before, meditation is quite difficult, and I wasn’t feeling much mana.

“Emptying thoughts”-.

This time, I decided to focus on concentrating inward.

Following the method of ki utilization I had learned from Hippolyte, I directed my attention to the slow-moving life-source originating from my lower abdomen.

Tingle, tingle-.

As I did so, I felt an odd heat-like sensation coursing through my body with my heartbeat, reaching all the way to the tips of my fingers.

My bl**d circulation, carrying this mysterious force, was awakening my body.

“Hey, Elfride! I can feel mana! This vivid power flows within me!”

“That’s not mana, it’s ki. They are clearly different.”

“d*mn, I don’t know what the difference between the two is.”

“Well, there’s nothing you can do about it. Initially, mana and ki are opposing resources. If you master one, you won’t be able to learn the other.”

Upon hearing this, I felt a shock as if I had been hit on the head.

I think I understand why Mars’ daughters can’t handle magic now. Though they have an innate talent for ki and sword energy, they seem to lack the aptitude for magic.

I now understand why Antiope was so excited when she emitted lightning from her hands.

“So, does this mean I can’t handle mana or magic?”

“If you were a regular person, that would probably be the case. But being able to handle either one of them is already quite remarkable.”

“Then… that’s true.”

I pulled out the dagger strapped to my waist.

It was my old dagger, corroded by the Hydra’s poison, but the repair I paid one gold for had been effective, and it was now in good condition, shining brightly.

Swish-.

I let the tingling sensation flowing through my arm and fingertips flow into the dagger.

The blade trembled with a hum and shimmered with a strange red light.

Ki is said to be one’s innate life energy, though not much is known about it yet.

Hippolyte’s ki was golden in color, while mine was an unsettling bl**d-red.

As I stared at it, I could see Elfride’s eyes watching me reflected in the blade of the dagger.

She said,

“If you can handle ki to this extent, you can make a living comfortably for life.”

“That’s true. But if I want to earn a letter of recommendation from a noble, I have to learn magic, right?”

“What happens if you get a recommendation to build a shrine? Is it really necessary? I no longer understand what you’re trying to achieve.”

“I guess so. But, I’ve started to wonder how far I can go. How much higher can I rise, and what can I achieve?”

“Do you want to become some great deity, like ‘The Golden God, Hassan’, or something like that?”

A great god.

That might be good too.

But the reason I work hard is not just for that.

I said,

“Elfride, remember the time I rode on the back of a dragon and looked down at the world? I felt really good that day. If I really become a god, I could enjoy that view every day, right?”

“…”

Whether she understood my feelings or simply gave up trying to understand them, Elfride sat on the bed and remained silent. That was explanation enough for now.

There’s something else I want to do, but I don’t really want to explain it. Hadesoo’s son Hassan. Pluto’s son Zigress.

Both are me. But it bothers me that I always seem to carry the shadow of being my father’s son.

I want to surpass my father.

Instead of inheriting Pluto’s shrine, I want to do what I want. Rather than taking over my father’s health center, I want to do something I choose.

Though I’m not exactly sure what I want to do yet, and I don’t know when I will, I’m certain it’s not about inheriting the health center.

In fact, I have always wanted to tell my father—truthfully, I don’t really want to inherit the health center.

However, no matter how much I grow, my father’s back seems too vast, too wide, like an insurmountable wall.

I want to surpass it now.

“Elfride, I’m going to start meditating again, so don’t interrupt me.”

“Interrupt? When did I interrupt you, you fool?”

I exhaled briefly to empty my lungs and entered meditation.

Empty thoughts, empty the body…yet this so-called “mana” remains a mystery. What exactly is it telling me to discard and fill?

Can I accomplish this within a week?

As I ponder quietly, I feel Elfride’s faint voice from the bed behind me.

“If you’re particularly eager, there is a way to feel mana quickly in a short period.”