Chapter 468

〈 Chapter 468 〉Part 1, Chapter 19, Section 24

“So, you’ve failed over and over again, whether it’s a guy or a heroine, doesn’t matter, and despite being raped repeatedly…you keep coming back to the start just to save me…”

“Ah, sorry. I wasn’t listening.”

Chang-yeom’s expression twisted strangely. I tapped my temple and shrugged.

“I just got this memory of you wanting me to do some rear-entry roleplay. Let me refresh that…uh…”

“…We’ve already done at least 300 variations! Can you take me seriously for once?!”

“I’m being super serious right now? Like, spirit buttholes…is that really their purpose? Guess I won’t need an enema after all.”

“Well, duh. Spirits are perfect beings. Completely flawless—way above humans… Ugh, seriously!!”

“Love you!”

“Aaaah!! Seriously?! So annoying!!”

I lunged at the hysterical Chang-yeom and hugged her tightly. She pounded my chest with her fists.

“Why?! Please!!! Just listen to someone else for once!!”

“I’m listening, see? Like this.”

“Go pursue another heroine route! Leave me behind! Split Seongju in half, grab someone random as your pillar boyfriend, or turn any girl who likes you into communal dildos! Got it?! Don’t ever come back!”

“Pfft. Saying that makes me feel sad.”

I grabbed Chang-yeom’s face.

“No one compares to you, so why would I do that? No matter how many times I fail, I’ll keep coming back. Even if you erase my memories… isn’t that just another form of failure?”

“…”

Chang-yeom didn’t respond. It seemed like she was exercising her right to remain silent since lying would get exposed instantly.

“But Shin-ra, this time is different.”

I gripped Chang-yeom’s face and locked eyes with her.

“I have a plan—a plan where both of us survive, and we can be happy together.”

The ending has been clear from the very beginning.

* * *

Whether I remember or not, the foundation of all my thoughts and actions revolves around ‘saving Chang-yeom.’

So, whether it’s the complete past me with all my memories intact, the current me who depends on Chang-yeom’s memories, or the future me fighting against impending doom, the goal remains unchanged.

“This time, I won’t fail.”

“No, you will. Again, just like always.”

Chang-yeom was steeped in defeatism. Despite countless failures, she refused to believe in my supposedly perfect plan.

“Really… I’ve tried every possible means. No matter what strategy I use, it’s impossible. So please, just give up. That way, we’ll both be more comfortable.”

“Comfortable dying separately?”

How could I live without Chang-yeom? That would be betrayal—to both her and myself.

“Die together, live together. And when the plan works perfectly, we’ll make it happen. You know the key pieces are already in place. Since you’ve read my memories, you should understand.”

“…No idea what you’re talking about.”

Chang-yeom wasn’t lying.

“Did you intentionally avoid reading them?”

“You’ve already said something like ‘perfect plan’ and ‘this time it’s guaranteed’ over a hundred times. Do you even realize how many times it’s failed?”

“…Life, man, is about staying positive.”

I hugged Chang-yeom.

“After looping a hundred times, at least each loop gave me a hundredfold worth of time with you, right?”

“Is that really appropriate to say right now?”

“Two decades per loop, multiplied by a hundred? Wow, we must’ve done it countless times. We’ve surpassed Yuna’s record long ago… actually, probably the whole world combined.”

“You just turned Yuna into trash.”

“…The whole world combined, as ‘Baek Cheonghwa,’ surpassing Yuna.”

Yuna is divine. I silently apologized to Yuna inside.

“Anyway, after doing THAT much, you still want to leave me? No way.”

“Aren’t you tired of it yet?”

“Tired? That’s why we have memory storage play, right? …Are YOU tired?”

“…No.”

Chang-yeom stepped back, grabbing my hand. Her teary smile looked heartbreakingly poignant.

“How could I be tired? Every moment feels new. Your methods for pursuing me are endless. And guess what?”

She pulled out a memory orb.

“This contains not only your memories but mine too. Maybe I’m pretending to lie to you while secretly experiencing everything for the first time.”

“Wow, so we could do virgin-lover play then?”

“…Maybe I shouldn’t have given you your memories back. Look what you’ve become.”

“Didn’t you say you’d return them after awakening each spirit individually?”

Voice, body, memories—all inherited somehow, making the past me pop up unexpectedly.

Past me versus present me. Emotionally, past me felt far simpler, but since Chang-yeom customized me to fit her ideal, I had no choice but to follow.

“Hem.”

I cleared my throat and knelt before Chang-yeom. The alignment of our eye levels was no coincidence.

“Trust me. This time, I won’t fail.”

“Can I really trust you this time?”

“Yeah. All those previous failures were because they were dumbasses. Syncing with you for only three seconds? Three minutes? Those guys were all premature ejaculators. They died too fast, couldn’t save you, and reset.”

“It’s all you, though.”

“Ahh, not listening. Doesn’t matter. I’m going to live forever with you. Now give me your blessing already. Jeolpung is already awakened, so this is it, right?”

I lifted Chang-yeom’s hand. Her delicate left hand trembled in mine. I bowed my head.

“Will you allow synchronization?”

“…Seriously, how many times have I fallen for this trick…”

Chang-yeom bit her lip, tears streaming down her face.

“…If you come back again, I’ll burn you to ashes the moment I see you.”

“Like you haven’t done that before.”

Quietly, I kissed her fourth finger.

At that exact moment—the entire world erupted in emerald flames.

* * *

“Familiar ceiling.”

As always, I woke up in the penthouse of a hotel. I’ve always noticed this—it feels like home but lacks comfort. Unconsciously, I realized it’s because this isn’t truly MY home.

‘Thought it was because I expected to get attacked by Cheon Gaeul.’

Though that’s partly true, it’s mainly because I consider the space where I live with Chang-yeom as my real home. I considered buying the entire hotel so we could spend eternity together.

‘But that’s impossible for now.’

Surviving isn’t just about imagination; it requires action. One wrong decision leads to instant death, and even correct choices might spiral into troll-filled scenarios that reset everything.

“…No turning back now. No ifs.”

I’ve exhausted every method imaginable and employed the last remaining option. If there’s still no solution, I’ll resort to my final—and first—choice.

Thud, thud-thud.

“Huh.”

Inside me, my heart—or rather, the core—started pounding again, reproaching me for such thoughts. Though Chang-yeom can’t physically emerge without the cube, she manages to communicate her intentions this way. I’ve overlooked her subtle cues until now.

‘Now I understand why my heart raced during intimate moments with others.’

It wasn’t my heart beating—it was Chang-yeom rolling around inside, throwing tantrums. I patted my chest.

“You just sit there replaying our memories. Love you.”

The pounding stopped. Reaching climax in consciousness equals death, meaning Chang-yeom likely just passed away momentarily. She’ll revive soon but will stay quiet for a while.

“Magical Gear…magical gear…”

I activated the dormant Magical Gear. As expected, numerous messages flooded in. I prioritized the most urgent and critical information.

“So Seongju finally showed up.”

Pluto had crossed halfway between Earth and Mars, having departed its orbit around Mars. Despite his meticulous scanning habits, Seongju charges recklessly once he finishes analyzing.

“The space bug is causing everyone headaches.”

Seongju remains the root cause of everything. Eliminating him would make even interdimensional spirits rejoice. If my last-minute realization about the celestial visitor’s purpose is correct, survival hinges on one path.

“I have to die. Only then can we survive.”

However, now isn’t the time. Seongju still needs some time to reach the Moon and dock Pluto with it. I must utilize this brief window wisely.

‘So I need their help.’

Reluctantly, I hesitated to deactivate the barrier. I understood why Chang-yeom deliberately erased certain memories.

‘Why are they all trolling rapists?’

Regardless of consent, situations, or my own actions—they’re all guilty of violating me and ensuring my failure.

‘Had I remembered, I’d have killed at least one by now.’

For instance, if Chang-yeom’s body was violated by Cheon Gaeul’s tentacles, I’d have wiped Cheon Gaeul off the map even if she suffered the same fate in Seoul.

If Seok Harang used sync techniques to overpower and rape me, I’d have either ignored or destroyed her regardless of Busan’s destruction.

If Hwanryong possessed a god’s body to force himself on me, I’d have annihilated both him and the host body.

In various forms—male disguises, ice dicks, monstrous transformations, brother exploitation, mechanical arms—they all found creative ways to torment me. The moment I screamed, Phoenix’s personality emerged, triggering global annihilation.

‘Only Yuna seems exempt from this chaos.’

Without the camaraderie and trust built over time, I might’ve harbored resentment toward them by now.

‘Still, I need to survive.’

Six goddesses.

Nothing less could guarantee victory against me. With great resolve, I deactivated the barrier.

“Whaaaat?!”

Spirits burst forth from everywhere. Leaning against the barrier, they stumbled and slid into the penthouse.

“You guys…seriously.”

I closed my eyes and calmed my anger. Looking at their faces would bring back memories of their violations, fueling unnecessary frustration. I almost wished Chang-yeom would take my memories again.

‘Which would lead to her questioning everything again.’

And erasing even the cherished memories of our love. Rising from the bed, I stood up.

“Will you all help me?”

“Eh…?”

“Why does your tone sound so…?”

Oh no.

Not again.

“Ahem, everyone, assist me. Or help me? Please?”

…

Why are they all looking at me like that?