Page Twelve – The Hell Passage
As I was handing out flyers in the underground shopping street, I also had to keep an eye on my father’s condition.
Wū Qínglán was handing out flyers slightly behind me. He seemed to have forgotten that there was someone else here who needed care—a mentally ill patient—and was enthusiastically promoting his club’s manga work, “Magical Girl Paradise,” to a few young boys.
Perhaps he was getting carried away, because even though he usually slouched, now his back was straight, and his face was glowing with energy, making him look years younger.
Is this how those fervent missionaries spread their faith?
“How’s it going, old dad? Are you adapting?”
After a moment of silence, my father replied, “Son, um… are there many women around?”
I looked around.
Coincidentally, we were in the 3C electronics area, where I bought a phone for Júzǐ.
Well, given that the main audience for electronics is mostly male, apart from the stores of Blue and Green factories, there weren’t many women here, making it relatively safe for my father.
“Not too many. Should I take off the headphones?”
He took three deep breaths, as if he were about to be executed, and answered, “Go ahead! Take them off and try!”
I put away his earphones and glanced at him sideways. Taking off headphones was like facing death. What was going on?
To prevent my father from encountering too many “enemies,” I deliberately chose less crowded underground passages while walking with him.
“It feels okay. Actually, hearing sounds makes me feel more secure.”
“Is it because you can tell whether there are women nearby?”
I held his arm and walked through the somewhat empty passage. “If a woman were to talk to you now, could you handle it normally?”
“Talking is hard. I still can’t do it.”
Wū Qínglán noticed that he had fallen behind us and hurriedly caught up.
“Xiǎo Kǎi, is the path you chose not quite right? There aren’t many people around, so what kind of treatment effect is there?” He patted the remaining color-printed flyers in his hand. “I can’t distribute these anymore!”
You’re here just to hand out flyers, huh?
Though I wanted to complain, it was true that fewer people were around, which indeed wasn’t conducive to treatment.
The pedestrians were mostly parents with children… upon closer inspection, all the shops were children’s educational institutions. With the country allowing a second child, these institutions were sprouting everywhere.
But children… oh no!
“Xiǎo Kǎi, team member, I have a bad feeling. Let’s speed up!”
“Agreed, Wū Qínglán captain. We seem to be entering an enemy’s encirclement.”
“Shocked! Why did we suddenly speed up?”
This passage was truly hellish.
Doll costumes naturally appealed most to children.
But we realized too late, as a thunderous shout of “Big Dog!” came from behind, and six or seven kids poured out from an educational institution, blocking our way.
These kids were short but sturdy, looking tough to deal with, especially the chubby leader.
Looking at the sign, my missing mother would be shocked—it was a children’s Taekwondo gym.
The chubby kid, who looked like a cannonball, charged at my father in the doll costume. Hey! Don’t you have teachers?
“Big Dog!”
The kid roared again during his charge, speeding up and looking intimidating. I hesitated to block him with my body, knowing it wouldn’t work.
“Old dad, brace for impact!”
“Only a storm can knock down a big guy!”
Then, the kid slammed into my father’s leg, and he let out a painful cry, “Rua.” I saw his leg bend unnaturally into a shape like a Japanese letter ク.
Oh no, did he fracture his leg?
“Dad, how’s your leg?”
“Son, what beast hit me with a hammer?”
“No, it’s something much stronger than a hammer. It’s a little ball.”
“Male ball or female ball?”
“It’s a male ball, and it’s hugging your leg.”
“At least it’s just a leg fracture.”
At least? Do you realize how serious this is?!
Sometimes I wonder if my father is mentally weak or strong. As long as women aren’t involved, he has infinite endurance and nerves like dead ends. But when it comes to women, his fragile mind is as thin as the rice oil on top of congee.
“Xiǎo Kǎi, Uncle Chang, the second wave is coming!”
Seeing the chubby kid successfully distract “Big Dog,” the other Taekwondo brats followed suit.
“Son! Save me!”
There were five brats in total. I managed to stop two, feeling my arms nearly breaking from the impact.
The remaining three still rushed toward my father. One of the taller brats ran and jumped, kicking out with a flying cross-leg move, pinning my father to the ground…
Blind and helpless, my father could only make embarrassing noises on the ground.
Hey! This flying cross-leg move isn’t Taekwondo, is it? Do you play like this with the animatronics at the amusement park?
Fortunately, the gym teacher finally reacted, rushing out with four muscular men in Taekwondo uniforms, dragging the brats back to the gym… the chubby one was kicked back like a soccer ball.
“Sorry, sorry, we didn’t watch the kids properly.”
The Taekwondo master apologized and adjusted my father’s dislocated leg, skillfully putting it back in place.
Wū Qínglán, who had been hiding, finally approached.
“That scared me. Kids are really terrifying.”
You’re just watching, huh?
“Let’s get out of here. It’s too dangerous.”
“If possible, I’d like to leave soon, but it’s too late…”
Wū Qínglán pointed behind me.
This passage wasn’t just a children’s Taekwondo gym. Behind us was the gym, and in front was a ballet training center for children.
It was clear from the name—it was an institution dominated by girls.
Ballet dancers in white dresses and socks stood in the middle of the road, fluttering their cute big eyes, curiously staring at my father in the blindfolded and stuffed doll costume. The costume looked inappropriate for children.
Let me explain! These little girls between pre-teen and teenage years are really adorable!
Their dance training gave them excellent posture, making them appear more charming than ordinary girls, especially their white-clad feet, which looked like ice cream… cough, I got carried away.
But these approaching little angels were deadly poison to my father.
“Dad, please take the headphones back.”
“Are there women in front?”
“Don’t ask, it’s all for your treatment.”
Even if I wore headphones, I could still lie to him that the girls were boys, which would be a kind lie.
But there was no time to put on the headphones.
“Big brother, can we hug this big dog?”
A little girl running towards us spoke in a cute voice, making my father, who hadn’t put on the headphones yet, slow down and become speechless.
I smiled kindly and bent down to speak to the little girl, “But there’s a man inside this big dog.”
“No problem, the ballet teacher is also a man, we often hug him, it’s fine.”
Anyway, let’s call the police and arrest that teacher first.
She tentatively touched the doll’s stomach and then hugged my father’s leg, saying, “So soft~ so soft~.”
Clearly, Wū Qínglán’s costume was high-performance, especially in terms of fabric.
…The situation was decided. This treatment session was over.
However, the little girl was really cute. I wanted to hug her and squeeze her.
But my father had completely shut down, losing all mental response.
First isolation contact therapy!
Failed!
In the end, it was Wū Qínglán and I who carried my father home.
…
…
I want to be hugged by a little girl too!
In the future, I’ll borrow this doll costume from Wū Qínglán and walk around in it myself…
