Chapter 96

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Episode 96: Hospital Visit and Hassan’s Club

My mind went blank.

“Are you saying that so-called ‘Holy Warrior’ or whatever is after me?”

“Yes. He always picks fights with warriors he deems strong. Dozens have already died by his hand.”

“d*mn… Hippolyte, you know I’m not that strong, right? And you still think he’ll come for me?”

“Hassan, to be honest, there are many Adventurers stronger than you. But in this City, no Samaritan is as famous as you. The Kind Samaritan—that’s the title of the ballad gaining popularity in the slums.”

A ballad—a song that tells a story. The kind bards sing for coins. But I’d never heard of one called The Kind Samaritan.

“…What’s that song about?”

“It’s about how you saved the bard Malco. That idiot was about to get stoned to d*ath when you showed up and said, ‘Only the sinless may cast the first stone.’”

What the hell? I remember something like that, but it feels off. Pretty sure I told them to go ahead and stone the b*stard.

How the hell did it get twisted like this?

“Uh… how do I put this…?”

“‘Only the sinless may cast the first stone’—such a wise answer, unexpected from the lips of a cold-hearted Samaritan. No wonder it resonates with the people.”

That little sh*t Malco. No idea where he’s wandering around now, but I’ll have to punch his lights out next time I see him.

“You look clueless. Then I suppose you haven’t heard the ballad about Nemea the Witch’s Lion either?”

“…First time hearing about it.”

“What about The Dance of the Warrior and the Crocodiles?”

“The hell is that now…?”

“Hmph. Well, bards tend to latch onto Adventurers who gain some fame. And the more their tales spread, the easier it is to climb to Gold Tier.”

At the mention of Gold Tier, the image of a gleaming golden necklace flashed in my mind.

In this World I’d been dragged into against my will, that necklace was worth as much as my ticket home.

If Malco’s songs and rumors could help me reach Gold Tier, maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing.

Hippolyte continued, “The more your name spreads, the sooner that troublesome Holy Warrior will hear of you. Especially since he’s infamous for hunting down fellow Samaritans—no mercy. Rumor has it, that’s why he was exiled from his homeland.”

As I returned from thoughts of Malco’s ballads, I recalled the savage Holy Warrior of Juno that Hippolyte had mentioned earlier.

The more famous I became, the higher the chances that brutal Human Hunter would come for me. d*mn. Scary.

“Afraid? Hassan, you said you wanted to become a Gold Tier Adventurer, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“Is it because of Noxdotty?”

“Huh? Wh-what…?”

Had I ever told Hippolyte I wanted Gold Tier for Luna’s sake? No, my memory’s been spotty lately, but I definitely hadn’t said that.

How the hell did she know?

“Your flustered face says it all. Gold Tier Adventurers gain the right to take a vow-bound woman as their lawful spouse. That’s what you’re after, isn’t it?”

“W-wait, that’s a thing?!”

I had no idea Gold Tier came with such privileges.

Then again, Gold Tier Adventurers were rare—maybe one or two per City—so I’d never had the chance to ask.

In this World without the internet, gaps in my knowledge weren’t surprising.

So that’s why Luna and Nox had insisted I at least reach Gold Tier.

As I pieced it together, Hippolyte looked down at me and said,

“Anyone can see there’s something between you and Noxdotty. So let me ask—have you already sinned?”

“S-sinned? What do you mean?”

“You know. That extremely lewd and blasphemous act. If you’ve crossed the line, as leader of the Maidens, I’ll behead you on the spot.”

Behead me?! I thought she was joking, but Hippolyte wasn’t the type. She was rigid in every way!

To keep my head attached, I scrambled for an excuse.

“N-no way! I might be an uncultured brute, but I’d never go that far!”

“Words are cheap. But your muscles won’t lie.”

Swish.

Hippolyte’s slender fingers slid under the blanket covering me and pressed against my bare abdomen. This woman was a monster who could detect lies through muscle tension.

I couldn’t help but panic.

“I-I’m serious!”

As I desperately defended myself, her fingers dug into my abdomen, sides, and chest.

“Ghk!”

My body was already wrecked with muscle pain, and now she was poking it? The agony nearly brought tears to my eyes.

“Hiiik!”

“Hmm… Your body’s in worse shape than I thought. No wonder you can’t move.”

Her probing fingers stopped, and soon her broad, firm palms began gently massaging my sore muscles.

“Wh-what are you doing?”

“Muscles this damaged make it hard to discern the truth. Stay still.”

Swish… press… knead…

“Aahhn…”

Despite the pain, her soft touch made my body melt.

Her technique was too precise—she knew exactly where to press to restore vitality.

“Uhhgh…”

“This position is… uncomfortable.”

Apparently finding it awkward to massage me from the side, she shifted and straddled my lower body.

Then, with both hands, she focused on my armpits and pectorals.

Knead… press…

The mix of pain, ticklishness, and relief left me dazed.

Shiver.

It felt so good my whole body tingled. And it was working—I could feel energy returning.

“Haven’t seen someone this battered in a while. You should visit a healing temple.”

“Th-those cost a fortune, don’t they?”

“For this? At least 60 silver.”

d*mn, that’s more than I have.

“Aahh…”

“Could you… not make those noises?”

“I-I can’t help it! It feels too good…!”

“I… see. Well, as a Warrior and a priestess of Mars, I understand. Mars’ priestesses can restore vitality through touch…”

I had no idea if she was telling the truth. My mind was too fogged by pleasure.

But I couldn’t afford to zone out.

I could feel bl**d rushing down there.

Hippolyte’s soft, firm thighs pressed against me through my pants, and it was torture.

If I got hard now, I might lose my head. What do I do?!

Swish… shift…

“You’re a terrible chair, Samaritan.”

Finding the position awkward, she adjusted her hips, grinding against me in the process—and I instantly sprang to attention.

Stiff.

Hippolyte froze mid-massage.

Throb. Throb.

My rebellious lower half strained against my pants, as if protesting its confinement.

d*mn.

I was dead.

To survive Somnia’s duel only to d*e like this? f*ck my life.

As my lower body burned, my mind cooled with resignation.

“…Why is it hard?”

Hippolyte’s voice was low, almost a growl. I couldn’t meet her eyes.

“W-well, when a man’s touched by a beautiful woman… this just happens…!”

“B-beautiful?!”

She jolted as if struck. Instantly, I regretted my words.

d*mn!

But what’s more embarrassing than getting hard in front of a woman? I was desperate.

After a heavy silence, Hippolyte coughed awkwardly.

Ahem. “W-well, if that’s the case… fine. But remember, Samaritan—I am a Warrior of Mars before I am a woman. Calling me ‘beautiful’ is… inappropriate.”

“M-my apologies…”

Our conversation died there. The awkward silence was agonizing.

Where the hell is Luna? She’s the only one Hippolyte softens for.

“…Samaritan, just curious—do you really think I’m beautiful?”

“Y-yes…!”

I answered honestly.

Tap.

Her palm rested gently on my left pectoral. Despite a lifetime of battle, her hands were strangely callus-free.

She held it there, silent, as if sensing something.

“Hmph. You’re a terrible liar, Samaritan. You deserve punishment. Get up.”

“I-I can’t move…!”

“Quit whining. Try.”

She shifted off my lap, and suddenly, my body felt lighter. Testing my back—

“Oof.”

To my shock, my paralyzed body moved. Sure, everything ached, and my joints creaked, but—

Movement was all that mattered.

Hell yeah, I can finally scratch my itchy back!

Scratch scratch.

Ohhh, sweet relief. Grateful, I turned to Hippolyte.

“You’ve got a gift for massage. How can I ever thank you?”

“Save the flattery. Warriors act, not talk.”

With a hmph, she sat beside me, turning her back to me.

“What’s given must be returned. Massage me.”

“You want me to massage you?”

“Yes. Even your clumsy hands might be of some use.”

She swept her tied hair forward, exposing her slender neck, pronounced shoulder blades, and straight spine—a physique so perfect it could be a medical diagram.

Thanks to her, I could move again. And since she’d criticized my massage skills before, I was oddly motivated.

I clenched my fists.

“I’ll do my best.”

“Guh—?!”

Hippolyte’s voice cracked as my fists dug into her baliao pressure points—where her hips met her thighs.

I didn’t just press—I vibrated my fists like a massage g*n.

Bzzzt.

Unused to such technology, she jolted. But this technique was perfect for stimulating those points, which helped with reproductive and gynecological issues.

Hippolyte had seemed to suffer from cramps, so I’d targeted this area.

“Ngh—!”

But my rough technique made her tremble. Maybe I overdid it?

“Too much? Should I ease up?”

“Y-your weak fists are nothing…!”

Whether pride or truth, she powered through.

Switching tactics, I used my thumbs to press her shenshu points—near the kidneys, incredibly beneficial for women.

Press—

Her tense muscles melted instantly.

“Haaah… ngh…”

She collapsed forward, trembling, her breath soft as morning dew.

d*mn. My lower half throbbed.

“You okay?”

“F-fine…! Y-your soft hands… aren’t satisfying…! Stop…”

“Not good enough? Then I’ll use a tool.”

I grabbed the thick, sturdy club leaning in the corner—perfect for a proper massage.

For the first time, fear flickered in the fearless Warrior’s eyes.

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[Afterword]

Mitsuri, hold your breath… Hnng…!!

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