190. Try
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To be honest, Lin Nan always felt that even if she became a girl, she wasn’t exactly the prettiest girl in the world.
Her looks were at best slightly above average, probably landing her somewhere in the “cute but not show-stopping” category. In every class, there were at least a handful of girls prettier than her, though she could at least hold her own as a contender for the class flower.
But compared to those campus goddesses? Well, let’s just say there was a chasm as deep as the ocean between them.
Thanks to magic, her skin was always flawless. And though her body hadn’t fully developed yet, her limbs were already slender and well-proportioned, giving her a silhouette that could be described as the “golden ratio” if someone needed to hype her up.
Chen Yao probably still thought of her as a bro, but now that he knew she was a girl, he seemed to care a little more?
It was like how Tu Junhui treated her with a lot more respect after inadvertently mistaking her for a girl. His jokes during their banter stopped being outrageously vulgar, and the swearing dwindled to almost nothing.
Lin Nan couldn’t wrap her mind around it, but having someone care for her felt really nice.
Even though she had moved out of the dorm, on Monday afternoon, she happily tagged along with her roommates to the dorm for a midday snooze, only heading back to her rental apartment after classes were over.
On the way back, she swung by the delivery point to collect her online shopping haul. Since she had chosen a local seller, her package arrived at lightning speed—essentially, she blinked and there it all was in one day.
“Don’t come over tonight,” Lin Nan texted Chen Yao as she plopped down on her apartment sofa.
Sure, it felt great to be cared for, but if Chen Yao showed up, wouldn’t it be just like living in the dorm again?
And that guy actually reacted to her!
Today, her monthly “Aunt Flow” finally said goodbye, leaving her feeling a lot lighter. Plus, after a night in the rental, she was finally starting to feel relaxed.
As she unwrapped her package and pulled out the lingerie she had bought, her expression turned serious. Meanwhile, Cola, the cat, jumped onto the coffee table, curiously eyeing Lin Nan’s recent purchases.
With her cheeks slightly flushed, Lin Nan quivered as she picked up a size A bra, feeling utterly clueless about how to go about this.
Honestly, before this, her understanding of women’s clothing came entirely from, well, adult animations, and she hadn’t watched many. So, facing the bra felt like trying to decipher ancient hieroglyphics.
This bra was the invisible kind—basically, the straps were semi-transparent, so they wouldn’t be obvious from the back.
But the question remained: how on earth was she supposed to put it on?
Lin Nan’s face was red, and she bit her lip, distinctly disliking the idea of wearing such a thing.
She tossed the bra onto the table and collapsed against the couch, “What if my classmates find out I’m wearing this? Right now, they still think I’m a guy… I can handle winter, but what about summer?”
But if she didn’t wear it, her chest felt all sorts of sensitive while she moved around—an awkward situation to say the least.
Cola looked up at her, suddenly realizing Lin Nan hadn’t fully accepted her new identity as a woman.
“Just try it on?” After checking online for tips on wearing a bra, Lin Nan sat up straight, muttering to herself for encouragement, “If it doesn’t work out, I can just toss it! It was only 20 or 30 bucks; I’ll just pick up more side gigs to earn it back…”
She then noticed the keen gaze coming from Cola. Her already flushed cheeks reddened even more. Even though she was aware Cola was a female cat, the embarrassment was overwhelming. She quickly grabbed Cola, gave her a cheeky twist by the scruff, and flung her into the bedroom.
Taking a deep breath, she stripped off her outer layers, completely bare, and shivered as she attempted to put on the bra.
It wasn’t terrible to get on, except for the awkward back hook maneuver that required some serious contortion skills.
Five minutes later, Lin Nan managed to strap it on, adjusting it according to the online guides.
Okay, it felt a bit tight, hurt a little, and made breathing somewhat challenging. And that awkward sense of shame was crashing into her brain like a freight train, making her cheeks even hotter.
Switching to a size B bra, it was certainly roomier, but possibly a tad too big.
So, am I about a B cup now?
The familiar embarrassment surged back, mixed with some intense stimulation that erupted in her mind. Even though no one else was around, Lin Nan’s heart raced, threatening to leap out of her chest, and her hands trembled, making breathing a bit laborious.
Realizing her true size brought an unexpected wave of disappointment.
She glanced down: the bra had a nice gathering effect—visually, it looked okay.
Calm down, calm down!
But dang, this was super embarrassing!!!
If she was already feeling this way trying it on at home, there was no way she’d survive if she had to step outside wearing it, she’d probably run away in shame at the mere glance from a passerby.
Next up: underwear…
Lin Nan’s eyes landed on the pink and white triangle panties.
No way, no how!
Fuming, she yanked them off and hastily threw on some clothes.
Sure, she’d done some embarrassing things to unlock magic, like wearing a female swimsuit, but that was only for a fleeting moment. This lingerie was gonna be with her all day long…
Best stick to the pajamas.
She had bought a suave men’s silk shirt and a pair of shorts as sleepwear. But when she pulled out the package, she realized she might have overestimated the size.
Originally aiming for a loose fit, she had picked the 175 size, but now she wasn’t sure how much she had shrunk, because it practically engulfed her—seriously, it looked like she was wearing a dress with how it covered a good third of her thighs.
As for the shorts? Way too baggy, but the silk felt heavenly.
Walking over to the mirror in the living room, she looked at herself, casually kicking her legs and stretching her arms. Maybe she overdid it, because the shorts slid down her thighs like a slip-n-slide.
“???”
Staring at her reflection, Lin Nan felt like she was either in a boyfriend’s oversized shirt or a sleep dress.
That blush that had just faded crept back onto her cheeks. Clearly, she couldn’t handle anything too feminine, and from her previous male perspective, her body surprisingly had a certain allure, which was too much for her to adapt to.
She had worn women’s clothing before! She had donned a swimsuit! Why was accepting this so hard?
“This is so tough for me…” She peeled off the sleepwear and resignedly sank back onto the sofa.
She wasn’t a man anymore—she should just accept these things and become a normal, everyday woman.
In a few years, she might forget her male identity altogether and face her new life as a girl.
Yet, there was still that lingering sense of unwillingness. Wearing women’s attire ignited an unexpected rage, and tears began to well up in her eyes—years of pent-up resentment surged like a tidal wave.
She thought she had already accepted her fate.
“It’s all Lilith’s fault!” Lin Nan blamed the elusive Lilith once more.
Cola in the apartment looked utterly bewildered: What did I even do?
