258. Wasn’t it before?
Lin Nan never imagined that one day, someone would confess their feelings to her.
And the one confessing was actually her best buddy from middle school.
Didn’t we agree that rabbits wouldn’t eat grass near their own burrow?
She clutched her left chest, feeling her heart pounding like it was ready to leap out at any moment.
Isn’t this all her fault? If she hadn’t treated Chen Yao as her magic-wielding tool, perhaps he wouldn’t have liked her at all.
But… she kinda likes Chen Yao too…
A knock on the door startled her; Chen Yao was outside, sounding a bit dejected as he apologized, “I got a bit too excited. Sorry about that… I’ll heat up your lunch and then go do some takeout deliveries for my parents.”
“If you want anything for dinner, just message me, and I’ll have them make it for you…”
Lin Nan curled up, her arms wrapped around her legs, burying her head in her arms.
“Mm.”
She replied softly, feeling utterly exhausted.
Listening to the sounds outside, Lin Nan let out a long sigh, and suddenly, tears began to flow uncontrollably.
If she were a normal girl, wouldn’t she have agreed to it long ago?
Living as a boy for eighteen years, Lin Nan had always been an introverted guy, but still a perfectly normal man—like Chen Yao, he’d enjoy reading comics, watching anime, and doing all the things guys do.
Yet transforming into a girl, even counting from the moment Lilith possessed her, was only about half a year.
In such a short time, even with Lilith’s memories complicating things, Lin Nan had barely accepted her female identity, let alone the psychology that comes with it.
She knew that she’d eventually have to accept this female mindset, or else outsiders might think she’s a weirdo, a girl on the outside but a guy on the inside.
Coco made her way over, strutting like a diva, looking up at her with that pancake-like face.
“Stupid woman! I don’t get what’s bothering you!” Coco swished her tail and paced around Lin Nan, letting out a somewhat shrill meow.
Even though Lin Nan didn’t catch the exact words of Coco’s rant, she could sense some mockery in the tone.
She looked up at Coco.
“What’s so bad about being a woman? Isn’t it great to have a bunch of guys falling all over themselves at your feet? We women need to conquer men and, by extension, the world!”
Coco continued her monologue, but Lin Nan didn’t catch a word, just feeling a hint of self-comfort there.
So she reached out and scooped Coco into her arms.
“WDNM! Let me go! I’m not a lesbian!”
Of course, Coco was just a cat, too scared to scratch, so after struggling for what seemed like an eternity, she could only stare vacantly at Lin Nan and grumble, “I’m not clean anymore…”
Lin Nan buried her face in Coco’s fur, taking a deep breath and catching a whiff of an unusual milky scent.
If she gave off a milk smell, then Coco might smell like goat’s milk.
Confusion flickered in her mind, but soon it was drowned out by Chen Yao’s confession ringing in her ears.
All she could think about was “I like you.”
Lin Nan began to understand Chen Yao’s feelings for her.
But what about her feelings for Chen Yao?
Cocooned in the softness of the cat’s fur, Lin Nan remained still, memories flitting through her mind.
The first time they met, that chatty, enthusiastic boy had a smile so bright it felt like sunlight, making her hesitant to get too close; the first time they became friends, the handsome boy had chased away the bullies; the first time they truly connected, she and the heartbroken boy clinked bottles, got drunk, and listened to him vent about his troubles.
They had hidden together in an internet café booth, excitedly searching for her “Biko,” only to be utterly baffled when they stumbled upon a cross-dressing anime.
They had both skipped school and were chased by the security guards, eventually jumping into a river and laughing at the guards leaving helplessly.
They had run away from home for three days, but once the money ran out and they got hungry and dizzy, they returned home with tails tucked between their legs.
They had laughed, cried, and even cheated on exams together, boasting on the honor roll…
Finally, Lin Nan remembered how Chen Yao had seriously said to her while sitting on the couch, “Lin Nan, be my girlfriend.”
She didn’t realize when her tears had stopped.
Lin Nan released Coco, stood up, wiped the tears from her cheeks, and flopped face-first onto the bed, rolling onto her side while fiddling with her phone.
——————
Chen Yao returned home, feeling utterly dejected, riding his electric scooter to the back door of his family’s restaurant. He pushed the door open and walked into the bustling kitchen, glancing at his father stirring a pot and his mother packing takeout boxes, but felt a wave of loneliness wash over him.
“Back already?” His mom shot him a glare. “Three orders! They’re all ten minutes late! Get moving!”
Barely finishing her sentence, she noticed the look on Chen Yao’s face and quickly asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
Chen Yao’s expression remained flat as he picked up the takeout, checking the addresses.
“Did you and Nan Nan have a fight? Did she bully you?” Chen Yao’s mom probed, “Did she make you mad? I can talk to her later!”
“It’s fine, you don’t have to worry.”
Chen Yao replied, “I’m off to deliver the food.”
“Hold on! You need to tell me what’s going on!” she suddenly raised her voice, becoming serious, “Did you two break up?”
“No… We’ve never really been good…”
He turned his head away, not wanting his mom to see his eyes, lifted the three takeouts, and pretended to be nonchalant as he turned to leave, “Got to go or I’ll get complaints.”
Chen Yao stepped outside, stored the takeout in an insulated box, hopped on his electric scooter, and sighed deeply.
How foolish of him; he thought maybe Lin Nan liked him too.
Now that he had confessed, how would he face her when they met later? Would they even remain friends?
Should he chase her down relentlessly until she admitted she liked him? But he knew Lin Nan hated being pressured, right?
Just as he was about to take off, he suddenly felt a vibration in his pocket.
Confused, he took out his phone and unlocked the screen, only to see a message from Lin Nan.
“Mm.”
Chen Yao froze, staring at that simple little word; it caught him off guard for a moment, but the next second, joy and excitement overwhelmed him.
He dashed back to his scooter, kicked open the metal door, and rushed back into the kitchen.
His parents were startled by his sudden reentry, but when they turned to see his face lit up with a huge grin, they were left in shock.
“Nan Nan said she’d be my girlfriend!” he exclaimed, nearly bouncing off the walls with excitement.
“???”
His parents exchanged confused glances before hesitantly asking,
“Weren’t you already?”
259. Ghs?【1/122】
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At eleven PM, Chen Yao finally got home.
Standing at the door, his hands trembled with nerves; when he turned around, he saw his mom peeking from the stairs.
“Go for it!”
He slapped his chest, trying to calm the rollercoaster of emotions. Meeting Lin Nan again seemed even scarier than confessing.
How should he face her?
Should he just lean in for a kiss? Or maybe take it slow, start with holding hands or something?
Not like that, mom! Don’t just stand there watching! Teach me!
He closed his eyes, took a few deep breaths, and took out the key, but his trembling hands fumbled, missing the keyhole a few times. Finally, he steadied his grip on the key and managed to open the door.
Inside was pitch black; Lin Nan was probably already asleep.
His mood calmed down at the thought, and he smiled at his parents before closing the door behind him.
After taking off his jacket, Chen Yao absentmindedly turned on the light. He was about to kneel down to take off his shoes when he suddenly spotted Lin Nan curled up on the sofa, hugging her knees, watching him intently.
“You’re still awake?”
Feeling awkward, Chen Yao scratched his head, stealing a glance at Lin Nan’s cute face, before she quickly buried her face again, “No.”
Clearly, Lin Nan was just as nervous.
Having changed into his shoes, Chen Yao sprayed himself with disinfectant, then hesitantly approached Lin Nan, finally plopping down on the other end of the sofa.
An awkward silence fell over the room. Chen Yao fidgeted with his phone, aimlessly searching the internet for tips on how to act around a girlfriend after confessing.
“Um…” Lin Nan suddenly looked up, speaking in a soft voice, “Come a bit closer.”
Chen Yao quickly set his phone aside and scooted over, sitting beside Lin Nan.
He got a bit too excited, thinking she might want to kiss him right then and there, but after waiting, he heard nothing.
Glancing at Lin Nan curled up on the sofa, he suddenly noticed her pale left hand resting at her side, while she hugged her curled-up leg with the other.
Is this intentional?
Chen Yao swallowed hard and tentatively placed his palm on Lin Nan’s hand.
Lin Nan shivered slightly at the contact but didn’t pull away; her ears faintly reddened.
For the first time, Chen Yao realized Lin Nan’s hand was ice-cold, like a block of ice. He looked at Lin Nan, who showed no signs of resistance, and tightened his grip a bit more, trying to warm her hand with his own.
Normally, her hands appeared slender and delicate, but now that he held her hand, he felt how soft and smooth it was.
Just holding Lin Nan’s hand made Chen Yao’s heart race faster than he expected.
Should he? A kiss?
As a guy, once you make the first move, your brain urges you to escalate things further.
So, after calming down a bit, he turned his head, leaning in toward Lin Nan’s cheek.
However, at that moment, it seemed a shadow passed by, and he suddenly found himself missing the target on the sofa. When he looked up, Lin Nan was already standing and rushing toward the bedroom without a word, her long legs carrying her quickly.
Wait, does this mean we’re gonna ghs tonight?
Chen Yao’s eyes lit up as he hurried to follow her, but once she got into her room, the sound of the door locking shattered his fantasies.
“Lin Nan, that’s my room…,” Chen Yao muttered, tapping on the door helplessly, “You’ve locked me out twice today already.”
“Sleep outside tonight.”
“I’ve had a long day, and you won’t let me sleep in a bed?”
Does that mean you still want to sleep with me?
Lin Nan’s face darkened as she flatly rejected him, “Don’t think too much! Go away!”
As soon as she finished speaking, afraid he’d misunderstand, Lin Nan opened a small gap in the door, peeking outside with her big eyes, whispering shyly, “I… I can’t accept being kissed yet…”
“But you kissed me before…”
Before he could finish, Lin Nan slammed the door shut again.
Flustered, her head was probably steaming from anger at his slip of the tongue!
Chen Yao was completely confused, not understanding what he said wrong—it was just the truth, wasn’t it?
He sighed and realized that figuring out Lin Nan’s feelings was only just beginning, and he was likely in for a marathon.
Inside, Lin Nan glanced down at her left hand, which Chen Yao had held; his warmth still lingered on her skin.
She suddenly flopped onto her bed, clutching the blanket and rolling back and forth.
Ahhh!!! Will he think I’m a weirdo? He won’t think I’m too easygoing, right?
She herself didn’t know why she had gotten so bold earlier, practically placing her hand right in front of Chen Yao.
But the feeling of holding hands was actually quite nice…
Coco, perched atop the computer desk, stared at Lin Nan rolling around as if she were a fool.
Exhausted, Lin Nan buried her head beneath her blanket, and after a while, she finally managed to calm her flushed cheeks before expressionlessly getting up to open the door.
Chen Yao was still standing outside; when he saw her, he awkwardly smiled, “I shouldn’t have mentioned that…”
Although he didn’t quite understand what he had done wrong, he recalled how his parents interacted and figured it wouldn’t hurt to apologize.
Otherwise, he might end up breaking up with his girlfriend on the first day!
Lin Nan didn’t respond, turning back to sit on the bed, fiddling with her phone.
“Do you want a late-night snack?” Chen Yao asked, trying to be extra accommodating.
Lin Nan looked up at him, frowning, and questioned, “What’s with that look? You’re being too careful about every word.”
She didn’t like how, even though they were closer, it felt as if they were further apart.
And Chen Yao’s attitude always made Lin Nan suspicious, wondering if he had ulterior motives, like wanting to get physical or propose some embarrassing request.
“Isn’t it just to avoid making you mad again?” Chen Yao sat beside Lin Nan, cautiously shifting a little closer.
When Lin Nan didn’t react, he edged even closer until their shoulders touched.
“What do you want for a late-night snack?” Chen Yao sighed in relief and resumed talking normally.
“Not eating. I’m on a diet.”
Peeking over, he found Lin Nan searching for fitness and dieting tips online: “Didn’t you say you wanted to gain ten more pounds?”
Lin Nan faltered and turned to him, her ears red as she explained in a barely audible voice, “Don’t you like it when I’m skinnier?”
She remembered how he had gazed at the models in female clothes a few days ago.
“Not at all! I’d still like you even if you were a pig!” Chen Yao declared earnestly, patting his chest, “I can take care of you at two hundred pounds!”
Lin Nan fell silent as she realized why some people referred to men as “big pig trotters.”
With a sigh, she crawled onto the bed and pressed the switch on her nightstand. Instantly, the room was engulfed in darkness, save for the glow from her phone.
“Let’s sleep; I’m tired.”
Chen Yao’s eyes lit up, and he bounced up to join Lin Nan in bed.
“You sleep on the floor.”
Chen Yao’s face fell: “Then I’ll go take a shower…”
