Chapter 115: Funeral
As Lu Yibei walked to school, he chewed on a pancake he bought at the community entrance that had two eggs added, while browsing through the records of the Urban Legends Chat Group.
He skimmed through the chat logs of the Urban Legends Chat Group from yesterday evening at seven until midnight.
…
【00:05 Net Old Pervert 0: Since someone asked, I’ll elaborate on the various urban legend girls and the different feelings they bring me! Let me light a cigarette…】
【00:07 Net Old Pervert 0: Let me think about where to start. Let’s talk about the zombie girl first! I’ll warn everyone right now, the zombie girl is the one I least recommend!
Although her body is cool and filled with yin energy, which can be refreshing in the summer, the smell is really too strong for an average person to handle, and her limbs are very stiff, making many positions impractical…】
【00:10 Net Old Pervert 0: If you’re really interested in that kind of urban legend, I personally recommend the vampire lady, but be prepared to be bitten on the neck at any moment, and remember to get a rabies shot afterwards.】
Lu Yibei chuckled at the nonsense from the user named Net Old Pervert 0 and secretly sighed, the creativity of silly netizens is indeed boundless!
This™ is definitely not a bus to kindergarten!
With such eloquence, why not write a guidebook titled “Urban Legend Customs Girl Evaluation”?
Thinking this, Lu Yibei continued scrolling down. Not long after, he frowned.
【00:35 Net Old Pervert 0: Lastly, I must mention, witches are really f*****g awesome!】
Lu Yibei, “……”
This……
d*mn! I feel somewhat offended by this!
Bro, this is already more than just XP, this™ is an SGP entry, right?
……
Focusing on the chat records of the Urban Legends Chat Group, Lu Yibei walked for about fifteen minutes and arrived at the classroom door located in the College of Arts and Literature.
He glanced up to confirm the classroom number, then put away his phone and walked in, looking for a corner to sit down.
Although he had already made an appointment with the counselor to meet today to discuss the speech, he planned to finish this class first before heading to the College of Arts office.
When Lu Yibei sat down in the classroom, there weren’t many students present. Small groups of three to five were gathered together, discussing things that interested them.
Perhaps because there were still about ten minutes until class started, those students showed no intention of controlling their volume, and Lu Yibei, sitting in the corner, could clearly hear their discussions.
“I’m telling you, the new game that just came out recently is amazing! Not only is the plot excellent and the main storyline smooth, but the quality developed with Unreal Engine 5 is truly top-notch!”
“That sounds interesting! Can you spend money in that game? How much do you need to spend to top the charts?”
“I actually don’t care about topping the charts; the key is whether there’s a ‘wife’ to fawn over!”
“……”
Lu Yibei, “……” I feel like they’re about to start arguing!
He thought, withdrawing his gaze from the three gaming enthusiasts who were completely on a different wavelength, and instead looked over at another group of four or five girls gathered together.
He couldn’t quite understand what the girls were discussing, just like many girls can’t tell the difference between Ultraman Jack and Ultraman Zoffy, he couldn’t distinguish the difference between the frosted cherry blossom lipstick shade and the soft fog little pepper lipstick shade.
Although Yun Meng’s lingering will was stirring to explain, he had no intention of listening.
He was still troubled about how to make the remnants of that will completely dissipate! Casually utilizing those remains might prolong this process.
“Tap tap tap——!”
Just as Lu Yibei was losing interest and about to pull his attention from those girls, a tall girl, with a mature and intellectual look, hurriedly walked in from outside and joined the discussion with the other girls.
With her joining, their conversation quickly shifted to a topic that interested Lu Yibei.
“Xiao Yun, weren’t you at home attending your relative’s funeral? Why are you back so soon?”
“Don’t mention it, I was scared to d*ath! If I stayed in that d*mn place any longer, I might lose my life.” The girl called Xiao Yun waved her hand, her face slightly pale as if recalling something.
“It’s just a funeral, right? I’ve been to several and didn’t find them scary at all!”
“It’s different for me!” Xiao Yun explained, “I’m telling you, but don’t tell anyone else! There were ghosts at that funeral!”
Ghosts? Lu Yibei paused for a moment, noticing the voices of a few girls quieting down, he nonchalantly stood up and moved closer to them.
“…Earlier, didn’t I say that my second uncle and my grandfather’s body went missing together? But then, the second uncle couldn’t be found, yet the body somehow reappeared.”
“Reappeared? Isn’t that a good thing? At least it’s buried properly!”
“Good? Not at all! They say it reappeared, but my big second uncle won’t let others see, and hurriedly wants to bury it before the viewing period is over, they didn’t even open the coffin during the farewell, who knows what’s inside?”
Hearing this, Lu Yibei couldn’t help but curl his lip; so, the advantages of advocating cremation in such places are really highlighted, right?
Some people know that urban legends are rampant everywhere and still go for burials; isn’t that just indirectly fostering these urban legends?
Upon hearing Xiao Yun’s words, the girl sitting opposite her frowned, “Yun, isn’t that a bit inappropriate? That’s your relative; not letting people see could have some hidden reason, right?”
“I’m not just talking nonsense; you have to hear me out! I saw strange things happen with my own eyes!” Xiao Yun defended herself.
“You don’t know, when preparing for the burial, my big second uncle asked for nine strong men from the village to carry the coffin, but guess what happened?”
“Zombie resurrection? But that could be explained with scientific principles.”
“Not a zombie resurrection!” Xiao Yun waved her hand, “Logically, nine people could lift an ordinary car, right? But when those nine lifted the coffin, their faces turned purple, and they could barely get the coffin off the ground, and then…”
At this moment, Xiao Yun recalled what had happened, her complexion shifting between green and white as she fell silent for a while. After her classmates urged her on, she continued.
“Then what happened? You have to tell us!”
“Then, just a few steps outside, the rope that tied the coffin broke, the coffin was overturned, the lid slid off and smashed the legs of two of the men, and inside the coffin…”
The girl sitting opposite Xiao Yun seemed to have guessed something, her complexion pale as she pressed, “Inside was empty?”
“Not exactly, there was still something inside.” Xiao Yun furrowed her brows, deep in thought, and spoke in a steady voice, “Inside wasn’t grandfather’s body, but my second uncle’s body, and he was wearing grandfather’s burial clothes…”
Looking at Xiao Yun’s dazed and lost expression, the girl gulped, “Xiao Yun, you—you’re not making this up, right? Even if there was a body, how could it possibly be that heavy?”
“I don’t know; I just felt it definitely wasn’t a problem of rope quality, they used really thick nylon rope, probably… probably…”
“Exactly, it’s roughly the same thickness as a rope used in tug-of-war; such a thick rope, even a fool could see it wouldn’t break easily.”
“So, all the relatives present were scared out of their minds, turning ashen; I stood there and felt… it was so quiet it was creepy, and I felt like my deceased grandfather was hiding somewhere and laughing at that scene.”
“Xiao, Xiao Yun, don’t scare us! It’s broad daylight, you can’t scare me!”
“I didn’t mean to scare you…” Xiao Yun said, “I was scared out of my wits too! No, my relatives were all terrified; within a few minutes, everyone found their own excuses and dispersed.”
“By the way, do you know what the most bizarre part was?”
“I don’t want to listen, I don’t want to listen!” one girl covered her ears, “Xiao Yun, please stop!”
Lu Yibei, “……” You don’t want to hear, but I still want to!
“It’s gotten to this point, just let Xiao Yun finish, okay?”
Yes, exactly! Let her finish! Lu Yibei glanced at the girl who spoke, silently agreeing with her opinion.
“Then I’ll continue!” Xiao Yun glanced at the scared girl and continued, “My cousin and his family were the last to leave; I was almost home when they finally set off.”
“He chatted with me on the way; he said when they left, they saw my big second uncle sitting alone in the courtyard, surrounded by my second uncle’s body…”
“My cousin said that there were seventeen or eighteen tables set out for the banquet in the courtyard, filled with cold dishes; my big second uncle had been drinking alone, and finally, he heard him speaking…”
“What did he say?”
“He said…” Xiao Yun swallowed hard, “Dad, you’ve already killed your younger brother, what more do you want? Is it that you don’t want to let me off either? If that’s the case, come out and take me with you too! Like this…”
“My cousin said when he heard that, there was no wind, but the white cloth hanging around the courtyard was fluttering violently, like it was waving…”
“My cousin was so scared he was dumbfounded, and after a moment, when he thought to run, just before leaving, he took a last look at the courtyard and saw an extra red lantern hanging in the main hall at the far end of the courtyard…”
“That shouldn’t have been his illusion; I remember it certainly wasn’t there at the beginning, it must have been hung later… Moreover, it was a funeral, normally how could there be a red lantern?”
Hearing this, Lu Yibei imagined a scene in an old-style courtyard, with white cloth hanging all around, one person sitting alone at a banquet table filled with dishes, the silent white cloth floating, and a solitary red lantern hanging in the dimly lit main hall…
How to put it?
It’s a good thing that girl’s cousin dared to look! Lu Yibei thought, if it were me, I wouldn’t want to stay in such a place for a second; I’d take a taxi and leave overnight!
