Chapter Twenty-Three: Professor Ma’s Deceived World
As Jumeng “forced” Luxianbei to go upstairs, Liu Banxian already anticipated that he would soon hear screams.
However, he guessed the beginning but not the end.
He thought the one screaming would be Luxianbei, but unexpectedly, the protagonist was Jumeng.
You’re too bold, kid, do you even know who you’re messing with?
Are you out of your mind!?
Liu Banxian thought anxiously, one hand on his stomach and the other on the staircase railing, quickly running upstairs with heavy steps.
“Ah——Ah——!”
From upstairs, continuous howls from Jumeng could be heard. Liu Banxian rushed upstairs in a hurry, but halfway up, he heard her childish shout.
“Don’t come up, get down!”
Liu Banxian stood in the middle of the stairs, looking up with a troubled expression, “But…”
“But what? If I tell you to go down, you go down!”
The king of urban legends in the great Peach Source, being spanked and crying like a weeping willow, how could he be seen by others?
Do I not have any dignity? Jumeng thought.
Liu Banxian, “…”
When two tigers fight, one must be injured; either Jumeng’s b*tt gets hurt or Luxianbei’s stomach suffers, or both suffer together.
But what does that have to do with me?
Forget it, forget it…
Liu Banxian stared at the staircase for a few seconds, then came to his senses, sighed silently, and quietly retreated.
In the main hall.
Professor Ma held a teacup, closely watching the commotion upstairs, and didn’t put it down for a long time. Seeing Liu Banxian halfway up the stairs being reprimanded by Jumeng, he paused slightly.
This little girl is really mischievous and willful, scolding her grandfather like shouting at a grandson.
Jade cannot be crafted without being polished; perhaps it’s not bad for Luxianbei to teach her a lesson?
But can such a cute little girl really be bullied by Luxianbei? Professor Ma thought.
Then, he suddenly realized that Luxianbei was also a cute little girl when suffering from Nightfall Syndrome, and found it somewhat understandable.
Not only that, he even felt a bit curious about the commotion…
————
On the second floor of Chunfeng Residence Cottage.
Luxianbei was joyfully spanking Jumeng’s b*tt as if playing a drumming game.
After a long time, perhaps his hand was getting sore, he stepped aside, seized Jumeng’s spot, and sat comfortably in a rattan chair, glancing sideways at her.
She lay sideways on the bed, one hand propping herself up, the other rubbing her b*tt, her small teeth biting her pink lips, her slightly chubby face with cheeks puffing out.
With her big eyes glaring fiercely at Luxianbei, as if she wanted to carve a layer of meat off him, her long eyelashes had a few droplets of tears, and her expression was inexplicably stubborn, showing no signs of yielding.
Pitiful, small, helpless, yet inexplicably deserving a beating.
I really want to hit her again! Bullying a cute girl seems quite fun… Luxianbei thought secretly.
“You b*stard, Luxianbei! You’re inhuman! I’m already this miserable, can’t you ease up a bit? Will it k*ll you?”
“Ah? I’m just bullying you because I feel sorry for you!” Luxianbei replied seriously.
If I don’t take the chance to bully you now, what if you endure through it later? What if the evil forces don’t k*ll you?
“Just wait!” Jumeng said fiercely, “I’ll let you experience what it’s like to be a father today!”
Luxianbei, “???”
What does that mean?
Can’t defeat me, so you want to make me submit to you?
From this, it seems that her current situation is truly dire; she desperately needs someone to do her bidding, otherwise, she wouldn’t be so proactive about me. Luxianbei thought.
While he was pondering, he heard Jumeng whisper, “Do you know how that belly of Liu Banxian’s got big overnight?”
As she spoke, she raised a jade-like finger, the tip shimmering with a green light, twirling like a wand and pointing at Luxianbei’s abdomen.
“Did you ever hear the urban legend that if little boys and little girls secretly hold hands, they’ll get pregnant?”
Jumang, the deity governing all things’ growth and reproduction… Such information briefly flashed through Luxianbei’s mind, and his expression changed drastically as he hurriedly covered his stomach and retreated far away.
Like a face-hugger, once it grabs a person’s head it lets go, yet it seems like it wants to grab a person and lay eggs in their stomach…
Are you a mythological species of the Chinese pantheon or a mythological species of the Western pantheon?
On one side, there’s a neighborhood cat that just got spayed and is experiencing a second spring; on the other side, an extraordinary tragedy involving Liu Banxian.
Luxianbei knew that Jumeng’s powers were not as simple as they seemed from her words.
Just the thought of becoming an urban legend with a big belly filled Luxianbei’s mind with only four words—social d*ath.
“Hide? Do you think hiding is useful? This is my territory; I have the advantage of time, place, and people! If I want, can’t I just make anyone pregnant?” Jumeng said fiercely.
Although her spirit energy was currently insufficient to support further use of Lesser Fate after last night’s ambush, Luxianbei wouldn’t know that, would he?
Liu Banxian’s large and living example is right before them!
Jumeng knew Luxianbei was a person of the heart and thought he wouldn’t dare to take risks.
“Sister, Big Sister, my good sister, can’t we talk nicely? Why resort to violence?” Luxianbei said weakly, “Come on, let’s put our hands down.”
“Shut up!” Jumeng placed a hand on her hip, taking a step closer to Luxianbei, and shouted, “You weren’t saying that when you were hitting me just now.”
“This…” Luxianbei opened his mouth, glanced at Jumeng’s little rear, and tentatively said, “How about I help you rub it?”
Upon hearing this, Jumeng’s expression darkened even more, ignoring Luxianbei, and directly jumped off the bed, walking towards him, slowly bringing her glowing finger closer to his abdomen.
Seeing Jumeng’s movement, Luxianbei suddenly realized her intention and shouted in a panic, “No, no, no! You know my mouth has a mind of its own; sometimes what it says doesn’t represent my true intentions. We don’t need to escalate things to this level, right?”
As he spoke, he gradually retreated to the corner of the wall, shutting his eyes tightly and wildly moving his body, avoiding Jumeng’s finger like a silkworm stimulated and crawling in the corner.
After a long while.
Noticing that the situation wasn’t heading in an indescribable direction, he slowly opened his eyes to see Jumeng sitting on the rattan chair, wearing a knowing smile.
Seeing Luxianbei yielding, Jumeng slightly raised her chin and casually said, “Alright, I won’t tease you anymore. Let’s get down to business!”
If I scare him further, expose my inability to easily use my powers, he’s likely to start taking advantage of me again.
Moreover, if I scare him away, I probably won’t find anyone to help me for a while, Jumeng thought with some disappointment.
Luxianbei examined Jumeng, sighed, and helplessly said, “It’s not that I don’t want to help; what is our relationship? Would I not help you? It’s just that I have my own difficulties!”
“I didn’t come to Tangcheng to tour; I have a mission for the Siye Society.”
“Besides that, I also need to help the project team recover artifacts that have flowed into the black market; uh, it’s those that came out of Peach Source. So how could I have the time to help you? And also…”
Just as Luxianbei was about to continue his sob story and rationally analyze to Jumeng that in the face of her enemies, he was merely cannon fodder and couldn’t be of much help.
At that moment, Jumeng seemed to remember something and interrupted his speech.
“Wait! You just said you want to help the project team recover artifacts that have flowed into the market?”
Luxianbei nodded.
“That’s easy then,” Jumeng clapped her hands excitedly and said, “Did you know those are all mine?”
Luxianbei nodded again, “I guessed.”
The incomplete characters on them have already been translated by the professor; you even wrote your name on them. If I didn’t guess, I’d be a fool, Luxianbei thought.
“Pretty smart!” Jumeng raised her eyebrows and continued, “But there’s one thing you might not know, which is why those little items flowed out of Peach Source and what they contain.”
“They contain things?” Luxianbei thought of the urban legend attack scene he saw at Tangcheng University this morning, his mind flashing, and he hurriedly asked, “Could it be that they contain urban legends?”
“Exactly! In addition to urban legends, there are also a small number of spiritual ability users, they are all my reserves, preserved like pickles over the years, you understand?” Jumeng said proudly, “Now it’s time to take them out and eat them.”
If I can devour all the core entities of their urban legends, I should be able to recover quite a bit, right?
The entities trapped in those little things are probably beyond saving. I was planning to give them some time to redeem themselves, but now I probably have to devour them earlier, Jumeng thought.
Goodness, you’re actually going to pickle urban legends and spirit users like pickles? Your Siye Society’s wanted list is not without reason… Luxianbei squinted his eyes, deep in thought.
Professor Hou lucked out and bought the real deal but didn’t know the artifacts contained urban legends… By night, the urban legends somehow broke free and attacked Professor Hou’s students.
So that’s how it is!
Doesn’t this mean that the process of the project team and relevant departments recovering the artifacts will become very dangerous? If you’re not careful, you might be attacked to d*ath by urban legends? Luxianbei thought.
Jumeng quietly waited for Luxianbei to digest the information, then wobbled over, tiptoeing to tap his shoulder.
“Little brother, do you understand what I mean?”
“As long as you bring me when retrieving the artifacts, I can help you identify them, ensure your safety, and conveniently devour those pickles to recover my strength. It’s a threefold benefit.”
“Once it’s successful, I’ll make you the hereditary ruler of the ‘Peach Source Green Hat King,’ wouldn’t that be delightful?”
Upon hearing this, Luxianbei shot Jumeng a fierce glare, clearly disliking this title.
“Tsk!” Jumeng spat, rolling her eyes, “Ungrateful. In our Peach Source, green is the most noble color!”
“Since it’s so noble, you should keep it for yourself!” Luxianbei replied irritably.
During their conversation, Jumeng covertly looked Luxianbei over, her big eyes spinning around, moving closer to him, tentatively asking, “So now you’re agreeing to help me?”
Luxianbei deeply stared at Jumeng, nodded, turned his face away, and perfunctorily replied, “Mm…”
“I want to clarify! I’m only responsible for helping you recover the artifacts and letting you devour the urban legends inside. Other matters are none of my concern. If there is any danger, I’ll leave you and run away at any time!”
Seeing Luxianbei agree, Jumeng smiled lightly, circling behind him and quickly climbed onto his shoulder.
Then, biting her lip and hesitating for a few seconds, she leaned closer to his ear and softly said, “Thank you, Luxianbei…”
Luxianbei froze for a moment, glancing at Jumeng sitting on his shoulder, confused, “What did you just say?”
Jumeng reached out and pinched his ear, impatiently saying, “Forget it if you didn’t hear it…”
While carrying Jumeng out a few steps, Luxianbei suddenly felt something flash in his mind and wondered, “Oh right, there’s one more question.”
“You can ask,” Jumeng nodded.
“Since those artifacts contain urban legends, why did the guys who attacked you sell them? Doesn’t that seem unreasonable? Wouldn’t it be better for them to keep them and devour the urban legends to enhance their strength?”
“Hmm…” Jumeng thought for a moment and said seriously, “Perhaps they didn’t recognize their value, or perhaps they couldn’t unlock the sealing spell I left?”
Luxianbei, “…”
Things probably aren’t that simple, are they?
If the urban legends were really that hard to release, Li Ziqi wouldn’t have fallen victim.
There might be deeper reasons behind this; until there’s definitive evidence, it’s better not to tell Jumeng to avoid adding to her worries… Luxianbei thought.
————
“What? You…”
When Professor Ma heard that Luxianbei wanted to take Jumeng back to the hotel, he was dumbfounded.
He just wanted to develop a grandfather-granddaughter friendship with this cute little girl, yet Luxianbei used some unknown method to abduct her.
This won’t do! Are you even human?!
“No way! Absolutely not!”
He couldn’t just stand by and watch his beloved student walk down the path of crime.
“Professor, please don’t rush to reject me!” Luxianbei explained, “I have no ill intentions towards her…”
Mainly because I’m scared.
“I’m taking her back because she has a good understanding of artifact identification, and she might be able to help us recover the artifacts!”
“Mmhm!” Jumeng nodded, patting her chest in agreement, “I’m amazing; there’s no artifact I can’t recognize. Just ask my grandpa!”
She looked like a kindergarten child boasting to adults, “I can go to the toilet by myself; isn’t that impressive?”
Having said that, from Professor Ma’s viewpoint, Jumeng shot a cold, icy glance at Liu Banxian.
Feeling that nearly palpable icy gaze, Liu Banxian shuddered, coming to his senses and quickly said, “Oh right! My granddaughter has been mingling with antiques since birth; her toys aren’t just Yuan blue and white or Tang Sancai; even the objects she played with during her zhua zhou ceremony were Louyang shovels and gold-finger charms…”
“Ahem—!”
Hearing Liu Banxian’s increasingly ridiculous statements, Jumeng quickly cleared her throat, interrupting his speech.
What child would display gold-finger charms and Louyang shovels in front of him during their zhua zhou ceremony?
“…”
After two seconds of silence, Liu Banxian patted Professor Ma’s shoulder, “In short, my granddaughter is unparalleled in artifact appraisal. Let her go with you; she might really help.”
Professor Ma looked at Luxianbei, who was beaming with ** on his shoulder, then seriously examined the sincere Liu Banxian, and his thoughts became tangled.
Wait, are you sure she’s really your granddaughter?
Why do I feel like you can’t wait to send her away?
As Professor Ma pondered, Jumeng climbed off Luxianbei and came to his side, grabbing his pant leg and shaking from side to side with her big innocent eyes, pleading, “Grandpa, please, please!”
“Bang——!”
Seeing the shamelessly cute Jumeng, Professor Ma’s heart instantly softened. He slammed the table and said loudly, “Alright!”
Whoever doesn’t let her come back with us, I’ll get angry with them!
Seeing this, Jumeng turned around, revealing a sly fox-like smile to Luxianbei.
Plan successful!
Luxianbei facepalmed and sighed silently.
And so, only Professor Ma was left in the dark about the world…
(Today’s writing was a bit stuck, shorter by a few hundred words…)
