Chapter 65: The Eve of Chaos (Part 1)
“Did she do all those things for herself?”
Old Mayor’s voice was hoarse and his question caught me off guard, leaving me momentarily dazed.
“No, it’s not like that.”
He didn’t wait for my answer and continued, “Of course, she isn’t doing it for herself. I believe someone as wise as you, Young Lady, is well aware of this.”
“Miss Ailna… she has indeed killed countless people, and her methods are ruthless, leaving no room for mercy. To be honest, this old man often loses sleep over it. I think about a lot of things… I think about her… if this continues, setting everything aflame without a second thought…”
“Even using the most brutal, savage means, if nothing changes, we’ll just be dragged deeper into the mire. The Church’s knights have already set their sights on us, as you know… And those innocent civilians in your eyes, their lives lost in vain—this incredible cost… is it really worth it?”
At this point, the old man looked a little forlorn yet resigned, sporting a wry smile. “Look at us, these worthless common folks… Clearly unable to do anything, yet we worry about this and are wary of that. We overthink everything, always hesitant to move forward, convinced that this isn’t right and that’s impossible, yet never willing to consider what must be done to push ahead.”
He rubbed his rough palms together and tossed another question at me: “Young Lady, if it were you faced with the enormous Holy Church, wanting to change something, what would you do?”
“……”
I had no desire to speak.
In fact, I couldn’t even answer him.
So, after a brief silence, the old man continued, “I can’t do much, but I refuse to be that stubborn old coot who holds everyone back. I realized, people like us, living on without changing anything is pointless, and once we’re gone, we’re just a pile of rotten flesh and bones, not affecting anyone’s life. Wait thirty, fifty years, and maybe no one will even remember us, because we couldn’t accomplish a darn thing…”
“We can’t change the filth of this world… d*ath is just that, nothing to lament over… However, Miss Ailna is different. She is genuinely capable of changing everything and is actively doing so. Even if her methods are harsh, that’s not what she wishes to see… If she had a choice, she wouldn’t have done those things… but she has no choice.”
“Compared to the enormous power of the Church, we are too weak… Miss Ailna is isolated… fighting against the odds… She simply can’t concern herself with so many matters… Yes, she is laden with sins, but perhaps she is the only one still alive who dares to confront the Church head-on… She has done what all of us want to do but can never achieve… truly remarkable… even though she’s still just a young girl.”
“Young Lady, you have your standards for judging good and evil, and that’s certainly not wrong, but whether good or evil, seeking solace deep within… won’t help you move forward—especially when faced with dire straits.”
“A smart person like you can’t possibly overlook all of this, right? You’re just selectively ignoring them… simply because, at that time, you still had a way out, and could act according to your own ideas, do what you wanted to do.”
“The sacrifices you witnessed in the Western Continent, those heart-wrenching losses, with disaster looming, you still have the ability to save some innocent civilians… But who can truly see that, then stand up to worry about the even greater disasters they will face? Who would dare to bear such heavy responsibility…?”
“Facing the vast, insurmountable power of the Church, typical folks like us, the common people, wouldn’t dare to stand up. Even if they did, they couldn’t do anything to change the situation, and most of those common folks don’t even know the truth of what’s happening…”
“And now, the only one brave enough to stand up and face the darkness is Miss Ailna. Perhaps in the near future, when you, Young Lady, learn the truth, you’ll also take action. Or maybe, in the distant future, even more people, more heroes, will choose to act once they see the truth… but for now, it’s just Miss Ailna, and she stands alone.”
“So…”
“In my eyes, no matter how many wrongs she’s committed, as long as her original intent doesn’t waver, that’s all that matters. I’m not trying to change the way you see her; I just couldn’t help but express everything I, an old man nearing the grave, can see and think… Ailna is a good girl, she’s just trying to use all she has to change this horrible, worsening situation, that’s all…”
“She just wants to change the outcome, even if it means countless sacrifices along the way, she is willing to bear that burden, even if it may cost her own life in the future. I believe… Miss Ailna would unhesitatingly make that final choice… she is that kind of person… You understand… such a weight requires an incredible willpower to bear…”
Old Mayor’s voice began to choke up again.
“What she’s doing isn’t for herself… She has killed some people, but only to save more who are still living in this world, for even more who have yet to be born…”
“She is worth living until the very last moment…”
He could no longer continue as his voice faltered.
Yet those teary, murky eyes remained fixed on me, and in those dim red irises, I saw a sorrowful, unjust fury.
“……”
I was really angry.
I wanted to say something to this old man in front of me, but my mouth opened and closed, leaving me speechless.
I suddenly couldn’t find words to rebut him.
Because…
What he said might not be wrong.
I had been listening intently to Old Man Robert’s earlier words, suppressing my boiling emotions, not interrupting him.
Because I realized he was a sensible person who understood just how horrifying and detestable Ailna’s actions truly were. He got it, unlike how I initially thought he was just muddled, yet even when accounting for the values he spoke of, I didn’t agree with that whole notion.
A person’s worth isn’t determined by these things.
Even if some things seem impossible to change, being able to make the important people around you happy, and willingly give yourself for that purpose… even if you’re just an ordinary person, your value is immeasurable.
Such worth shouldn’t be demeaned or destroyed by anyone.
I wanted to argue against him on that, but as I re-evaluated…
I understood his point.
The old man was simply saying that sure, those who died were pity-worthy, but their deaths would not change anything or affect any outcome.
But Ailna is different.
No matter how many evils she’s committed, she is still a persistent and capable person who can potentially alter outcomes. If she were to d*e, then perhaps there would no longer be anyone brave enough to confront the darkness of this world and change certain things.
d*mn it…
What he said might just be right.
