I am back – Chapter 189

“…….”

Inside the returning carriage, Arna silently gazed out the window.

On our way to the capital city, my older sister and I had ridden in a white carriage, just the two of us. I had wondered if it was normal for such a large carriage to hold only us, but it turned out that it was simply a newlywed couple’s carriage.

Since I had wanted to return with my companions, the carriage was now larger—a six-seater, compared to the one I had come in.

I thought the journey back wouldn’t be too boring, but…….

“…….”

Everyone was lost in their own thoughts, not a word spoken.

Last night had been quite fun. Elves rarely made loud noises while laughing, so when they did, it was a rare occasion. Thus, on such rare days, everyone relaxed and enjoyed themselves.

My older sister and I danced.

It wasn’t the type of dance where you have to think about various things like at a formal ball.

We sat around with my friends, chatting, and with the music playing, we simply held hands and hopped around, shaking our bodies.

Well, thinking back, it was a bit embarrassing.

But it didn’t matter. The moments my sister and I had shared like that were certainly moments worthy of being called ‘memories.’

Moreover, I had taken plenty of photos with my smartphone, just in case.

Though we wouldn’t be showing those photos to anyone else… well, even if we did, it wouldn’t matter too much. After all, the people sitting there wouldn’t believe they were real elves. They’d probably think it was just some cosplay party from a foreign land.

“…….”

Everyone had been so happy and drunk last night, yet today, the very next day, they remained silent, lost in thought.

Or maybe they didn’t know how to start a conversation?

Especially Arna was the worst off.

Arna hadn’t been drunk last night, nor had she shown any embarrassment as she usually did. She had joined in on the fun, but that was all.

But if you were to ask if she didn’t look happy… well, that wasn’t it either. Arna didn’t hide her feelings in front of us. If I had been mistaken, then it would mean I had misunderstood Arna not just in that moment but throughout the entire five years.

The atmosphere in the carriage was a bit awkward, and my older sister tightly held my hand.

“…… five years.”

Then she almost let go in surprise.

The moment my older sister and I held hands, Arna opened the window, making it feel like it was because of that moment.

But Arna continued to stare outside.

“It’s a story I’ve mentioned before, but for elves, a day is a day, and a year is a year. They simply have more of that time, and if something takes about five years for them, it is considered quite a ‘long’ time.”

“…….”

Not just me, but everyone in the carriage turned their gazes towards Arna. Even though Arna was looking outside, the one speaking was still her.

“Yes, with having so much time, it’s also true that sometimes we have the habit of wasting it. The rate at which elves form relationships is so slow that to humans, it might just seem like time is being wasted.”

“…….”

Arna hadn’t shared such thoughts often. In fact, talking about lifespan in front of humans rarely ended well. While elves surely had their own struggles, humans, whose lives were much shorter, often found it hard to empathize with elves. They’d think, ‘You have so much time, after all.’

Of course, we wouldn’t react that way towards Arna.

“Indeed, that might be it. Perhaps those with time might just be wasting it.”

Arna, who was gazing outside, turned her head back to us.

“……Some might use this to compare the rich and the poor, but that’s completely the wrong analogy. Time can never be shared with someone else. It can neither be given nor received. You cannot refrain from it. Even if you do nothing, time just flows by.”

“…….”

“My time, and your time, are the same.”

We remained silent.

Arna rarely spoke to us with such a serious face. While she often had serious things to share when relaying things she witnessed during the war, after the war ended and life resumed peacefully, she hardly spoke like this. Instead, she often talked about plants she found interesting.

“Five years is a long time. It’s enough time to know a lot about someone. In that sense, I’ve spent a lot of time with you all. However… even so, that time is relatively short compared to an elf’s life. The time we’ll spend together in the future will likely be the same.”

Ah.

I finally understood what Arna wanted to say.

After we died, she would live on for a long time, aging slowly. A time so long that it would be impossible for us to endure. Without us.

Yet at this moment, to Arna, we were important people. Not just politically but as acquaintances, as friends. We were bonded by having risked our lives together for the past five years. We could willingly do that for each other.

“Some might say that in an elf’s life, humans are just one of the countless people who pass by, and that they’re beings that cannot even be known for long. As time flows, they gradually forget, and in the end, the wounds will heal… no, I don’t think so.”

Tears glistened in Arna’s eyes as she looked at us.

So I couldn’t bring myself to say the common consoling words.

I had seen Arna cry often. Especially during her first year with our party, she cried every day. For those who passed away without fully experiencing their short lives. Blaming her ignorance.

But… this time, seeing her face turned to us, crying, was something I had never seen before.

“In the past 155 years, I have never met anyone as reliable and lovable as you. Not among both humans and elves. Yes, new relationships will develop in the future. As time passes, other lovable and reliable individuals may appear. But even so, that won’t fade the light of your loveliness. Just as the time elves and humans have is equally precious, so too is yours.”

“…….”

“During my childhood as an elf, I believed I had a fistful of time in my hands. Therefore, I thought if I created time, I could accomplish things that humans couldn’t, and I could craft narratives as great as history alone. But I was wrong. My time flowed just like yours. By the time I realized it, time was already slipping through my fingers.”

Arna’s voice was now unmistakably soaked with emotion. But we all didn’t know how to comfort her. Human forms of consolation, or elven, wouldn’t reach the current Arna caught between those two.

“That joyful time we had yesterday, surely, it cannot last forever. At least, not in my life….”

Arna said as she wiped her eyes with her sleeve. Ironically, that looked strangely like a child.

“So… I want you to make me one promise.”

“Promise?”

I could barely voice a response to Arna’s words.

Hearing my voice, Arna finally nodded and replied.

“Right… from now on, I hope we can see each other often. As much time as possible, let’s see each other’s faces, have conversations… if possible, just like today, I hope we can laugh and dance together. Enjoying drinks, chatting happily, and catching up…”

Even though it was just a promise between friends, the way Arna said it seemed somewhat desperate.

After looking at each other, we nodded. Even my older sister, who was sitting next to me, nodded too.

“Sure. Provided we have time, we can visit here often. To be honest… my sister and I have quite a bit of money. We could live for several weeks without working, so it shouldn’t be a problem.”

“…….”

Arna couldn’t finish her words and just nodded.

… I see.

We must return. We cannot remain in this world forever.

And if we can only come here once every few years, Arna will surely see us aging each time we meet.

“And one more thing.”

Arna prompted, and we listened carefully.

“If you ever… meet a prophet first, I hope you won’t forget me. When I get there… I won’t forget you either.”

“…….”

We couldn’t bring ourselves to respond, merely nodding in silence.