I am back – Chapter 201

“I’m going to contact Mom today.”

As we sat side by side at the table having breakfast after washing up in the morning, my older sister said that.

“Today?”

“Oh, don’t worry. Mom is really busy. We’re working too, right? Just because I say I’m going to contact her doesn’t mean we’ll set up an appointment right away.”

“Ah, right.”

I heard that story during the wedding too. Mom is living a really busy life right now.

Thanks to that, it seems life has improved a lot. At least we don’t have to live in some run-down basement building that’s been around for decades. I don’t know exactly where Mom lives now, but I’m sure it’s way better than the place we spent our childhood.

“Yeah. Actually…”

My older sister glanced at me for a moment and then picked at her food while speaking.

“I got a lot of help from Mom after you… disappeared.”

“Ah…”

After I died, my sister said she couldn’t really socialize for a long time. I know she couldn’t even graduate from university properly. I died a horrible death right in front of her when she was just one year away from graduating.

She told me she had liked me for a long time. So, losing someone she liked in such a way… there’s no way she could lead a normal life after that.

What would have happened if it were me?

…I probably would have been even worse off. My sister was at least almost done with school, but I was just starting. If that had happened then, I surely wouldn’t have been able to attend school properly and wouldn’t have maintained good grades afterward.

“Even when I was just holed up in my room, Mom didn’t say anything and just helped me. She didn’t pressure me to do anything and just… talked to me gently every day. Mom must have been much sadder than I was.”

“……”

The atmosphere turned solemn with her words.

It’s hard to imagine what a parent feels when they’ve lost a child. I can only vaguely imagine how terrible that situation must be.

That wound will never heal. Even if they say they buried it deep in their hearts, every time they think about it, tears will fall.

“So…”

As I hung my head, my sister spoke with a firm voice.

“So you must tell Mom. That you’re here now.”

“…Yeah.”

When I first returned here, I was only thinking of myself.

I was focused on how to sneak back into the lives of those I loved, to fill the empty space I left behind in their hearts. Even if I couldn’t fully go back to the way things were, I thought only of ways to live happily with Mom and my sister.

But… thinking it over again, that’s the wrong way to think.

I needed to find my place properly.

For Mom’s sake. For all the people who care about me. To heal the wounds I caused.

“I really want to tell Mom.”

“Sure.”

At my words, my sister smiled.

*

“Ah, I got a reply.”

My sister said that just as lunchtime was rolling around.

We sent the message before we left for work, so technically it might be a bit late for a reply.

But thinking about it again, Mom is busy. She’s probably caught up with various tasks and might not have had time to respond to a personal message. Especially business people tend to carry both a work phone and a personal one.

If the phone she’s usually holding is for work, she might not get around to checking her personal one.

“…… It’s fine.”

When my sister said that, I watched her a bit nervously, and she nodded at me.

Then she handed me her smartphone.

In the messaging app that almost everyone in Korea uses, the chat history between my sister and Mom was open.

The first message that caught my eye was from my sister to Mom after returning from her trip.

[I’m back!]

[Daughter! How was the trip? Did you get hurt?]

[Yes, it was super fun. No injuries! I’ll send you the photos later!]

[Thanks! We need to meet in person sometime. Sorry for not being able to contact you properly since I’ve been so busy.]

[Oh come on, don’t say that. Let’s really meet up sometime.]

[You can show the photos then. It’ll be more fun to see them while talking in person.]

[Shall we do that?]

[Yeah, thank you, my daughter!]

[Sure, see you next time!]

As I read through the messages, I realized I was smiling. My sister and Mom seemed really close, which was nice to see. My sister always talked about receiving help from Mom, but in reality, didn’t Mom also receive a lot of help?

Her only child suddenly disappeared from this world. Mom must have needed someone to lean on too. Even though she’s an adult, she’s still a person. So… because my sister was there for her, Mom could stand strong like this now.

The conversation from the day we returned from the trip ended there, and the very next one was today’s message.

[Mom, do you have time? I want to see you.]

That was what my sister sent me this morning. If you think about it, we usually leave for work earlier than most office workers. We had to prepare the shop and bake bread. Besides, one of our bakery’s main sources of income is selling bread to people on their way to work.

And several hours later, at 1:30 PM, Mom finally replied.

[Huh? Daughter! What’s up?]

[I want to continue the conversation we had last time. I have many photos to show you and stories to tell!]

[Oh, right. Sorry. I’ve been so busy I forgot to let you know.]

Then, possibly lost in thought for a moment, it took her a few minutes to respond.

[You took a break on Wednesday, right? I think I can make some time next Wednesday. Shall we meet that day?]

[You don’t have to force yourself to fit me in… The bakery can take a day off.]

[I can take a day off too. I’m just going to see my daughter, you know. Thinking about it, I’ve only taken vacation days twice this year. I’ll take a day off so we can meet that day.]

[Even if you make time, we probably won’t have a long conversation.]

Mom sent the responses in two parts.

[Then… Thank you. See you that day.]

[Yeah. See you then, my daughter!]

By the time I finished reading the messages, a smile was on my face.

It was really… a warm exchange.

To be honest, I was a bit envious. I wanted to have conversations like that with Mom too.

And at the same time, I felt nervous. If it’s next Wednesday, then there’s only a week left.

As I handed the smartphone back to my sister, she smiled at me and said.

“Great. We’ll get to meet soon.”

“Yeah. Right.”

“……”

I was trying to smile at my sister, but it seemed she noticed that I was nervous.

Well, after spending the last few months sharing a room, she’d be able to read my face easily. I’m not really good at hiding my expressions anyway.

Moreover, even though we look different, my sister has known me for a very long time.

“Don’t worry.”

My sister lightly placed her hand on my shoulder and said.

“It’ll be fine. And if it’s not, I’ll be right there with you.”

“……Yeah.”

“Let’s trust Dana.”

I bit my lip lightly.

I had already received so much help. The friends who were my allies… no, my friends, and my beloved were all doing their best to support me.

So… even if the outcome isn’t entirely positive, I’ll be fine. There are already people all around me.

They’re all people I love.

“Yeah.”

This time, I nodded with a bit more certainty in my voice. My sister smiled when she saw me like that.

“Good. You should wear that brave look. You’re a hero, after all.”

“……Ugh.”

At her words, my expression fell instantly. I had heard the word “hero” plenty of times, but hearing it like that from my sister made me feel incredibly embarrassed.

“……Not anymore.”

But I couldn’t completely refute my sister’s words either. I really was a hero at one time. And I might still be one while I’m here in Irrelaysia. Even if the holy sword had melted away, its power still responded to me.

“No, you’re still a hero.”

My sister leaned in a little closer and said to me. My face felt even hotter because of it.

“You came all the way here to save me. So that means you were a hero even before you came to Irrelaysia.”

“……”

I found myself darting my eyes around and then shot my sister a glare.

“Then you must be a princess?”

“……”

Now it was her turn to look away.