This World is too Cruel to Men – Chapter 185

I wasn’t sure if that remaining spot, which was still undecided, would actually be taken by my senior, but I felt the need to talk to her anyway.

While I was lost in thought, gazing at my senior’s suddenly quiet face, Chae-rim seemed to ponder something and eventually signaled to my senior with her eyes.

It was as if she was suggesting they step outside for a moment to talk.

Did my senior also pick up on the meaning behind that silent gesture?

After a brief moment of contemplation, she cast a quick glance in my direction and finally nodded slowly, rising from her seat.

“Then I’ll just step out and have a quick chat.”

“Okay.”

Although I willingly let Chae-rim and my senior go, I couldn’t shake my uncertainty about whether it was really okay.

The reason for my doubt was that Chae-rim had explicitly mentioned before coming here that any hospital of a decent scale inevitably had connections to the Association.

This meant that the place where I was currently hospitalized probably had a good chance of being under their scrutiny, implying that almost everything happening here could be reported back to the Association Chairman.

That seemed quite likely.

This made sense because the negotiations led by Chae-rim had ended up being relatively favorable to us, indicating that the Association had incurred some losses in the process.

To compensate for that, they would certainly be keeping a close eye on our movements.

What if the report of my senior and Chae-rim being together reached the Chairman’s ears?

It wouldn’t be surprising if, while pondering who to fill that last spot with, the Chairman would first consider filtering out my senior.

After all, the reason for trying to have someone stay by my side, even going so far as to make it a cohabitation arrangement, was likely to monitor my movements. It would be absurd to choose someone who had a strong chance of being influenced by my side as a guard.

One puzzling aspect in the midst of this was that it didn’t seem likely for Chae-rim to be unaware of these subtleties.

Did she possibly have another plan?

Or maybe she had some clever trick that would force the Chairman to pick my senior?

Well, that could be a possibility.

After all, the justification was certainly sufficient.

It made sense since my senior and I were from the same school.

Moreover, the record of me having acted as her temporary manager was probably sitting right there in the Association’s database. If used correctly, it might lead to quite a favorable situation.

‘At the very least, I would be more trustworthy than a complete stranger…’

Amidst such thoughts, a voice filled with hesitation reached my ears.

Of course, the owner of that voice was none other than Yoonseo.

Breaking away from my swirling thoughts, I turned to look at Yoonseo, who appeared to be fumbling for words as if she wanted to say something.

‘Now that I think about it…’

She had been strangely quiet all this time.

I hadn’t noticed earlier because I was too focused on the conversation between my senior and Chae-rim, but looking back now, it was odd.

But why?

Could it be that she was tense because of Chae-rim?

Maybe that was possible.

‘She’s liked her since childhood…’

Just looking at Yoonseo’s room, it was decked out with Lightning Lady merchandise provided by the Association, so it was easy to imagine how much she admired her.

“Why? Do you want me to ask my sister for an autograph or something?”

I was convinced that it had to be because of that, but as soon as I asked, Yoonseo shook her head vigorously.

“N-no, that’s not it…”

If it’s not that, then what could it be?

Was there something weighing on her mind?

A sudden thought crossed my mind, compelling me to wait silently for Yoonseo’s busy mouth to open.

How much time passed?

Finally, Yoonseo, who had been gently biting her lip, spoke up.

And what came out was—

“Do we really have to do it that way?”

Those words.

“What do you mean by ‘have to do it that way’?”

“That… what you mentioned before. About living together and all…”

“Oh.”

I wondered why she was concerned about that.

Immediately after realizing the cause of her hesitation, a cautious voice followed.

“Can’t we just decline?”

“Huh?”

“Just because you’re a guard doesn’t mean we have to live together.”

“Well, that’s…”

That was true.

“Honestly, it feels a bit burdensome, doesn’t it…?”

That made sense too.

While Chae-rim was okay with it, if the heroes from the Association were both women, saying we should live with someone we didn’t know at all was a bit much.

If someone driven purely by instinct were in my position, they might open their arms wide and embrace this situation, but I certainly would not.

“Just as I thought? So can’t we just say we want to live separately?”

“Still, it’s a bit awkward to refuse…”

Despite the way Yoonseo immediately countered, it was purely out of consideration for Chae-rim’s sincerity.

Why had Chae-rim brought about this outcome in the first place?

It was undoubtedly because it was the best outcome they could achieve.

But to simply overturn the carefully negotiated result just because of some vague feeling of burden?

No matter how I looked at it, that didn’t sit right.

“I might as well say it’s boarding…”

So, it seemed better to leave it at that.

Though Yoonseo didn’t seem pleased with my choice.

‘Well…’

From Yoonseo’s perspective, it was understandable.

After all, our home was a refuge where she could roll around freely away from her parents’ watchful eyes.

But thinking about another person moving in suddenly made it hard for her to feel good about it.

“Why? Are you worried you can’t lounge around at our house anymore?”

“No, I just…”

“Don’t worry. They won’t say anything just because you come and go.”

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“Don’t worry. They won’t say anything just because you come and go.”

That wasn’t it at all.

What she really wanted to say was something entirely different.

She just… didn’t want to.

The thought of another girl living in the same space as Dogun was unbearable.

Especially with not just one or two, but three.

Just the thought of it made my fists clench involuntarily, a clear indication of how much that reality bothered me.

Yet I couldn’t voice that discomfort because of the sight of Dogun’s left arm, which was wrapped tightly in bandages, taking up my attention.

What could be the fundamental reason behind the Association dispatching people to protect Dogun?

It was obviously that arm.

The discomfort Dogun had to endure was undoubtedly because of that.

And who had caused Dogun to be in that situation?

That would be me.

That meant it was this side’s fault that Dogun had to suffer.

Of course, if I said that, Dogun would undoubtedly insist otherwise.

But still… no matter what, even if I were dead and resurrected, that fact would not change.

Yet to impose something on Dogun merely because it didn’t sit well with me?

That was unacceptable.

Leaving aside the question of conscience, if something bad happened to Dogun as a result, I wouldn’t be able to handle it.

So… I couldn’t speak.

I could feel the words of rejection rising in my throat, but I could only keep pushing them back down.

And at the same time, I realized.

I realized that I could no longer enjoy the same moments as before.

What if those unknown guards began living in Dogun’s house?

It would mean that standing by Dogun, walking to school with him, and sharing those evenings and weekends which I had thought would be exclusively ours would be taken over by someone else.

‘I hate it…’

The thought that I had to give all that up made me feel a chill run down my spine.

“Or maybe…”

“Yeah?”

“Should I just… move in with you guys?”

So, I let that thought slip out.

Of course… I knew.

I had no right to say that, especially when I had played a significant role in putting Dogun in this state.

But… if Dogun allowed it… then maybe… it wouldn’t be too bad.

So I found myself wishing.

Hoping that the words ‘How about it?’ or ‘Go ahead.’ would flow out of Dogun’s mouth.

I really wished for that, but what returned to me was—

“Hey, Yoonseo…”

The response I actually received was such.

“You’ve got to be kidding me?”

That statement struck me right in the chest.